Based on the topic of what kind of city you want to live in, I wondered what people think the best gay city is? I don't mean what has the best bars, but rather what city seems like it's not a big deal to be gay.

Trevor

Well San Fran i think would have to be in the top 5 of anybodies list. Pretty damn gay friendly here hell the majority of people just assume your gay if you live anywhere in the vicinity of the castro even when your not. From the cities i have been to i would say it is less of a deal in san fran than any other city.

New York, definitely.

Maybe Seattle.

I would say a toss-up between San Francisco and New York. I can't imagine a place friendlier to gays than my beloved hometown, where even the straight guys often try to look gay

It's not NYC or San Fran but you might be surprised at how gay friendly Minneapolis is.
Minneapolis doesn't have a gay ghetto but as a gay person you feel comfortable almost anywhere in the city. 5 gay candidates were elected to city office (city council, park board etc.) in last Novembers election. No place is perfect but this is a pretty comfortable place to be gay and out.

Best City: NY

Best Gay City: SF

[quote]Originally posted by mplsboy:
It's not NYC or San Fran but you might be surprised at how gay friendly Minneapolis is.
Minneapolis doesn't have a gay ghetto but as a gay person you feel comfortable almost anywhere in the city. 5 gay candidates were elected to city office (city council, park board etc.) in last Novembers election. No place is perfect but this is a pretty comfortable place to be gay and out.

---

I've heard the same from lots of people. One of these days I wanna go find out for myself.

As far as the Western U.S. and Canada, here are my choices as follows:

#1-San Francisco (hands down, my second home town.)
#2-Vancouver, Canada ( Beautful, and gay friendly)
#3-Seattle, (rich liberal leanings).
#4-Portland, Oregon (maybe even more liberal than Seattle, lotsa girls!)

Well if you believe Queer as Folk, its PITTSBURGH!
I've lived in New York my whole life and love it. My job has allowed me to travel to most of the big cities in the country plus I've traveled alot with my softball team. Managed to have fun almost everywhere! That said, the places I love: San Francisco, San Diego, Montreal, Chicago, Minneapolis, Dallas and New Orleans. Next level would be Atlanta, Los Angeles, Providence, Seattle. Just one weary traveler's opinion!

Like George, I've traveled a lot over the years. I've lived in Los Angeles, and I love Sanfrancisco, but I'd have to say my hometown of New York, and Fort Lauderdale second.

Well, New York and San Francisco are the obvious choices. My sister met a woman who grew up in the Village who said that she had trouble understanding what people meant by "coming out", because the idea of concealing your sexuality just wasn't normal to her. As she put it, "where I grew up, if you hadn't declared yourself bisexual by the age of ten, you just weren't cool!"

All the major Canadian cities--Toronto, Vancouver and Montreal are quite gay-friendly. I don't really know Portland, Oregon well, but I got a very positive vibe from the place.

Anyone know anything about Manchester (where the Brit QaF is set) or any other cities in the world outside of the US and Canada? I imagine Paris and Sydney are pretty gay friendly.

Melbourne is very gay friendly. We are in the middle of our gay festival called Midsumma. We had our Pride March last Sunday with 60,000 people marching, including the Chief Police Commissioner & gay police (all in Uniform). This weekend is the Red Raw which is hugh dance party. Red Raw has been happening for nearly 20 years. The week ofter that is our Fair Day.
The other great thing about Melbourne is it's the Sports Capital of Australia. As you all know the Australian Open is on at the moment. Later in the year we have the Formula One & 500cc Grand Prix, The Australian Rules Grand Final in September & the Melbourne Cup (Horse racing) in November.(There is a public holiday in Melbourne for the race). Throughout the year we have all codes of Football, so there is plenty to watch
Melbourne is a different city compared to Sydney.
Sydney is also very gay friendly with the Mardi Gras Festival every year. This year the added bonus of the Gay Games. I hoping Outsports are going to have a function when the games are on so we can all catch up.

When you talk about the best gay/bi cities I think the best judge is in what city would you feel most comfortable holding hands or kissing or whatever with a guy in public on an avg day, and it doesnt necessarily have to be in the "gay area of town", and it not being a big deal to anyone around you. id say that would have to be NYC or SF

You know guys, it would be much easier to do this my way: Start at the bottom with Tulsa and go up from there.
BTW How does Ft. Lauderdale rank? I'll be there in two weeks for two weeks. Any suggestions on where to go? Vanilla/Kink? Anything? Please anything. I don't want to be able to walk or talk when I get home. Just a goovy satisfied grin.

hey thumper, if I was going to Ft. Lauderdale, I would go anywhere. I think its still where the boyz are!

Noone mentioned Miami. I thought Miami was pretty Gay friendly, and of course there's always Key West, that is one place I felt totally free to be myself, not exactly a city, but still a great place to live if you are gay. IMHO

Also, I spent quite a bit of time in Regina SK Canada. It's not a gay mecca or anything, but I was surprised how easy going people were there.

Re: Melbourne

Melbourne certainly is sports capital of Australia, a real plus and with all the variety noted by Aussie Bomber. (Though I take exception to Aussies bombing the New Zealand side at the Melbourne Cricket Grounds.) And my straight mates there tell me that gay is more accepted in Melbourne than New Zealand, though I regard New Zealand as much more gay comfortable than most of the U.S.

I can't be objective about NYC, but 8 years of Giuliani has taken most of the life out of whatever "scene" there was outside of Chelsea. Brooklyn, esp 5th Ave in Park Slope, is nice tho.

I was shocked on my second trip to SF how fast SoMA had deteriorated -- booooring. (The Castro is too cloney for me.)

CHICAGO was real nice last July, esp the Sunday barbecue at Big Chicks! Guys actually *conversed*, and with lesbians too.

In another thread, p2insdca posted

Great (gay) places to live

Hi all..

So, I find myself in a rather interesting position. I am unemployed, was a buyer planner in electronics manufacturing so thats a dead end. My partner of six years was laid off last week,we had "the" talk. Looks like thats a dead end too..

So I am planning on putting my house on the market, and doing the I'm 44 and starting over.

So far I have lived in Detroit (hometown) Atlanta, LA and now San Diego. So it is a little bit before one am and I am wondering where are the cool places to live?

Would love to hear why you love your town.

I miss thunder, rain and 4 seasons...but I also have a puppy that is a short coat, so I guess upstate NY is out;)

[ October 16, 2003, 05:24 AM: Message edited by: m1 ]

I live in DC, but the most fun I've had in a gay area of a city was in Chicago. It was great thta gay men and lesbians actually went to some of the same places and I met a ton of people. in fact, the second night I was there, some people we met the first night took us to a party and now we have friends in Chicago to visit when we go back.

Austin is pretty cool. We had an openly gay state representative until his district was realined to boot him out of office. There isn't a "gay ghetto" like other big cities have. There are gay bars and very-gay-friendly coffeehouses and restaurants all over town (not just in one district), a gay pride weekend every June (it now includes a parade), gay businesses are all over the place, too. Then there are the gay beginning-of-summer and end-of-summer parties on the lake. It's also not unusual to see two guys or two women holding hands while walking down the drag (the main street next to The University of Texas) or down Congress Avenue downtown. Plus, I think the gay film fest (AGLIFF) is one of the longest-running gay film festivals in the country. There are also big businesses (IBM, Dell (I think), Apple Computer, etc.) in the area that provide domestic partner benefits. Austin is a gay oasis in this growing ultra-conservative state.

[ October 16, 2003, 06:55 AM: Message edited by: bobby78751 ]

I live in Minneapolis. I do have to say I am happy I live in a place where I can be myself. You know, I just take being gay as second nature. I have been confused once as a straight guy at a gay bar. ANYWAY ... Minneapolis men have a tendency of being passive aggressive. It isn't fun and my friends wonder why I am so angry about men in Minneapolis. If I hear one more person say that guys are the same EVERYWHERE, I'll punch them in the throat. GOD!

Anyway ....

I do have to say I really like Chicago. The whole city gives me a wonderful feeling - it has a great vibe!

Washington DC is a place I love. My friends all live there. I miss them and they should me a good time in DC around Dupont Circle and in the suburbs.

Atlanta is pretty damn cool too. I do like those Atlanta boys w/ their Southern accents. They are completely charming. Hell, I heard a vulgar comment made, but it sounded so sweet and so nice, how could you take offense??

[ October 16, 2003, 09:01 AM: Message edited by: Allen ]

Seattle is a great place for GLBT people to live. Seattle does have a gay ghetto, but I think our community has gone beyond just living and being on Capitol Hill. More and more GLBT people are moving away from the gay ghetto and into the suburbs. West Seattle is now becoming very gay, as is the Olympic Penninsula. My partner and I just moved back to the gay ghetto after living on the Olympic Penninsula for 7 years. During those years we made many GLBT friends. Our jobs have brought us back to Capitol Hill and we are enjoying it. Seattle is truly a gay friendly place.

New York, Los Angeles, and South Beach.

Montreal

NOT Milwaukee! :confused:

Depends on the definition of "best"
Gay-friendly: San Francisco. Gay-things-to-do:NY
Gay-Hunkiest:LA Gayest-city: Miami

[ October 16, 2003, 09:42 PM: Message edited by: savvy ]

If Austin is the oasis does that make Dallas the mecca?

Something I failed to mention in my posting about Austin, there is a very large amount of gay-welcoming places of worship in town, too. This weekend at my church, UNIVERSITY BAPTIST CHURCH, we are having our 7th Annual Gay and Lesbian Baptist Retreat. About 10 years ago, the church was thrown out of the Southern Baptist Convention for ordaining a gay Deacon. The religious anger didn't end there-- university membership dropped for a while because the home churches of many Baptist University of Texas students refer their students to other Baptist churches and we've been the target of Fred Phelps and his group of bigot cronies -- they swore they were coming, sent faxes, and threatened, but a storm grounded his group's plane in Dallas. University membership is picking up again. My gosh, we are right across the street from the largest university in the country! You'd think we'd have a decent college membership. UBC is not all gay (probably less than 10 percent of the membership gay), but they are a very supportive community of believers. Anyway, there are all sorts of gay-welcoming churches, temples, and houses of worship all over town...and they are not welcoming you to change you -- they are welcoming you for you.

MSU Bobcat wrote:

Well, that comes as a bit of a surprise. I've been to Regina several times and never really found it to be particularly gay-friendly. I know they had a major controversy over Gay Pride Week a few years back. With a population of 200,000 Regina is small (even by Canadian standards) and thus not a city which has a lot of amenities catering to gay people. It's also smack in the middle of the prairies, far from any large city, which makes it a rather unusual destination for a gay traveller. However, there are worse places to visit, and if you enjoyed yourself, that's all that matters.

As far as the most gay-friendly cities in Canada, Vancouver and Toronto top my list. Even 'redneck' Calgary has become much less uptight about sexual orientation, judging by the ever-growing number of gay businesses here.

Denver is great, love the Rocky Mountains!

I had the most fun at the pride festival in Chicago, but for just walking around holdin' your dude's hand, I would have to vote for Vancouver, BC. Plus, you see a lot more couples walking around holding hands and no one bats an eye!

I've lived in and near Toronto for 23 years now, and I would have to say that it's pretty gay friendly.
My partner and I were able to walk down the street hand in hand in the early 80's with no problems.

I'm going to Atlanta on Saturday. Anyone know of a good place to go on a Sunday night for the MEN??

Is there still that place called Swinging Richard's in Atlanta? (I think is what it was called when I was there a couple of years ago.) It features nude male dancers. I also saw porn star Billy Brandt at a club...I think it was at The Metro.

I'd have to say if you mean places where you could be an out homosexual, the top two would be New York and San Francisco, followed by Los Angeles, Chicago, Boston/Cambridge, Minneapolis, Toronto, Montreal (one of the wildest gay cities I've ever visited), Miami, Seattle, Portland, Atlanta, Providence, Denver, Austin, Ann Arbor, Madison (WI), and Philadelphia. For lesbians, I'd add western Massachusetts.

In New York, you can actually live as an out homosexual person in many parts of every borough, not just in the gay ghettos of Manhattan and Brooklyn. Not everywhere, but almost everywhere. There is some anti-gay violence and anti-rhetoric, but from the Mayor and City Council to most businesses to many regular people, the idea that homosexual people are part of the city (and the suburban counties of Westchester, Nassau and Suffolk) has become an increasingly accepted fact. And this is the case for a city of over 8 million people. Just across the river in New Jersey, you also have a huge gay population in Hudson (Jersey City, Hoboken), Bergen, and Essex Counties (Newark), so altogether you probably have more than 2 million homosexuals in the area, more than entire population of many cities.

San Francisco is probably the gayest city in the United States per capita, and one of the most liberal-progressive. I also live part of the year in Chicago, and while it's not as far along as either New York or San Francisco, it is considerably more open than a lot of places, and not just in the gay neighborhood Lakeview/Boystown. There are other areas, like Andersonville, Rogers Park, Lincoln Park, etc., as well as suburbs like Oak Park, Evanston, and so on, that are pretty gay-friendly.

Gay states: I'd have to say my home state of New Jersey is one of the best. New Jersey is politically moderate to liberal-progressive, with one of the richest and most highly educated populations, and in which even most of the Republicans are fairly moderate. The state is racially and ethnically one of the most diverse in the country, and was one of the first to approve not only antidiscrimination laws but also to allow gay couples to adopt children. It also may be one of the first to allow gay marriages. Illinois is a little further down the list, though Chicago and its suburbs do have a powerful effect on the state.

[ October 22, 2003, 05:48 PM: Message edited by: fantomas ]

Let me add, for the University of Iowa Outsporters, last year I went to your alma mater for a conference, and partied at the gay bar in town. I have to say, it was a refreshing experience; a wide range of people, of all sexes, races, genders, dancing to hiphop, house and dance, having a great time, and the people were VERY friendly. So I'd also add Iowa City, as well as lots of other college towns, which often are oases in some of the more conservative states.

And then there's New Orleans, one of my favorite cities, though I don't know how easy it is to be openly gay there....

This thread has become an advertisement.
Anyway, did anyone mention Melbourne, Australia? They are supposed to have the largest gay couple population anywhere.

This topic is somewhat uninteresting. Most large cities have just enough gay-friendliness.

How about gay-friendly towns/small cities?

Laguna Beach.

Only been there once, but Blake's and Backstreets are the Midtown equivalent of Woody's and Babylon (sort of -- there weren't any go-go boys the night I was there). I've heard of Oscars (a Sidetrackish video bar) and Woofs (an actual sports bar) but haven't been to either.

Not all large cities have that much "gay-friendliness"; seriously, Memphis, Tennessee is a pretty large city, and while it has gay bars, etc., I don't think it'd be that easy to be an out gay person there. Can anyone speak on behalf of Indianapolis? Milwaukee? Cleveland? I've lived in St. Louis, and while it's changed in the last few years and become MUCH more welcoming (the pressure of having Kansas City and Chicago not that far away shouldn't be taken for granted), it was pretty homophobic for a long time outside of the Central West End, Soulard, and pockets in the suburbs.

Among smaller cities, one of the most pleasant I ever visited and hung out in was Richmond, Virginia--the historical overtones there were difficult for me, but as a city with a lively little gay life, it had much to recommend it, especially the Cary Street area. Roanoke, Virginia, is another city in Virginia that has out gay people, as does Charlottesville.

I only mentioned cities in North America, but if we go global, I'd have to add Amsterdam, London, Paris, Rio de Janeiro, Berlin, Barcelona, Brussels (yes), Lisbon, Salvador da Bahia, São Paulo, Madrid, and Marseille. I've never been to the Eternal City (Rome) or Italy at all, so I can't speak about it; the wildest gay cities in Europe I'd say are Amsterdam, Paris and Berlin, the last two having gay mayors these days.

While there are many (very hot) gay people in Santo Domingo and San Juan, I wouldn't say those are great cities to be out homosexuals. I've also never been to Australia or any city in Asia or Africa. Mexico City has gay things to do, but I'm not sure I'd want to be an out homo in Mexico in general, especially in Guadalajara State, which has a rep for being extremely homophobic.

ATLANTA!!!!!!!!

Ah, Atlanta, where the men look like Tarzan and talk like Jane.

I agree that there should be a distinction between "great cities" and "great gay cities"

While Washington DC is a Great city and I love my old neighbourhood at DupontCircle... overall.... it is not the gay friendliest of cities.

Likewise.... most parts of Manhattan is very gay friendly. But out in Queens, Bronx etc.... homophobia creeps in again. I personally would not feel comfortable holding my lover's hand in Queens. (no pun intended) wink But let it be said, I do love NYC.

Similiarly San Fran is (obviously) a very gay friendly city. But even there you can find outcroppings of homophobia. I think it'a an american thing that can be located in varying degrees all over the US.

I happen to love San Diego. combination of a great city with great weather(when it's not burning to ashes) and beautiful people and it is very very gay friendly. I feel just as comfortable in SD as I do in San Fran. and I get less ugly stares than in NYC.

Atlanta.... I'm just not a fan of in both ways. There really isn't much to do after 9PM and except for a small part of Midtown Atlanta (around Piedmont park)I would never feel comfy holding hands or kissing in public in Atlanta.

if we really wanna talk about the best combo of both worlds..... we have to get outside of the USA (as previously suggested)

Except for a coupld of maghrebin neighbourhoods, Paris has me feeling comfortable wherever and whenever. and even more is Madrid and Las Palmas (both of Spain) Beautiful people, total freedom from homophobia and an amazing city with a beautiful nightlife (Madrid) or a plethora of gay and straight nude beaches

Absolutely! My parents moved to Austin when I was in college. When I would stay for the summers or holidays, I really got to know the city very well and thought, "What have I been missing?". It turned out to be "my official coming out" city as I moved there after college. I practically lived at Oil Can Harry's (on 4th street if I remember correctly) and participated actively in the FrontRunners (gay running club). I am not sure I will ever live in an environment like that again, and it was by far the most free I ever felt. I remember being very open back then, and not worrying about what people would think outside of the bars! Then, I got a "grown-up" job and moved to Houston. UGH! Since then I have lived in a few other cities, but I still have my fondest gay memories of Austin. Since my parents still live there, I go back now and then. But since all of my friends back then either moved away or (gasp!) died, I pretty much hang out with the folks.

A new contender for the gay tourist dollar... Philadelphia!

eek!

Maybe God (or Goddess) has determined that San Francisco is the best gay city. Here is a double rainbow in the southern sky. My patio is due north of the Castro in Marin County.

Double Rainbow

As much as I like living in Philly, and visiting it before I moved here, I think the current campaign for the pink dollar is a bit...weird.
I doubt that Ben Franklin ever flew a Rainbow flag. So much for getting history straight. Fun but not a fact. And that little kid in the photo hints at either pedophilia or endangering the life of a child more than his skill as an educator. The guy got burned enough that I don't think he would have let the kid near him during his famous electricity experiments.

I don't think there's anything wrong with wondering through the back streets of the gay area with all the restored 17th and 18th century restorations is a hidden treasure. And the recent increase in the number of coffee houses and restaurants in the area generates that sense of community that many of the famous (infamous?)ethnic groups in the city have developed. Philly's the biggest little town in the country IMO. More manageable than New York, cheaper than San Fran and more remaining history of the country's formation than just about any place.

I haven't visited the newly, if not so well, restored Philadelphia Waterworks museum yet, but had a peak in as they were closing. The entrance is the small building on the left in this detail of prints made at it's peak when it was a tourist attraction because of its novel engineering. The large building on the right will become a restaurant eventually.

Oh, and nice photo Cowboys Fan. I've seen a double rainbow over Philly approaching the city on West River drive, right over the Water Works. Magnificent.

[ November 14, 2003, 08:05 PM: Message edited by: sportinlife ]

Posted by Boslthrman (Member # 468) on December 17, 2005, 07:28 PM:

Hi, Guys - Here's my situation - I'm in Boston, with a company I think will probably be sold within six months - and probably lay off the remaining employees (there have been two layoffs in the last three years). I feel like I'm stuck in the city for at least a year to two more because I'm pursuing a master's degree at Harvard and I don't want anything to screw that up.

But assuming I can take care of myself for a couple years, I'd like to then relocate to a gay-friendly city with a better housing market than Boston. Even on a decent salary, it is still impossible to afford my own home here and I want my own place.

I have very little family and we're not close so geography is wide open. Just looking for a good place to put down roots. ... any ideas? thanks!

Advice? - Stay in Boston

There are not very many cities in the world that are as gay friendly as Boston.

If you think Boston prices are high wait till you see prices in New York or San Francisco.

Rob

I've enjoyed this thread a lot - and thanks to the great administrator for posting my earlier posting here where it's more appropriate

I've been to San Fran and New York and would never consider living there full time. There have to be other alternatives. I'm struck by how many of the areas listed on this thread are among the most expensive housing markets.

I was with Atlanta with family this summer and was amazed by how just darn relaxed the city felt. But I had no chance to check out the gay scene. Austin sounds interesting - maybe I need to plan a vacation. Philly? Isn't the hateful Rick Sanctorum senator there? Not that that has to mean anything.