Is Cyd Anti-Gay?

I just saw this and I was shocked.
Shower at home dude!

http://www.newyorkblade.com/2004/12-24/new...calnews/gym.cfm


[Thread title modified for clarity. - Outsports moderator]

[ January 08, 2005, 09:45 AM: Message edited by: m1 ]

I am at a loss as to how objecting to public sex in a gym shower makes you "anti-gay"?

Have sex at home, dude!

Get a room!

This thread title is surely provocative.

Sex at the gym is inappropriate, but it happens all the time. Not so much at my gym, but you can spy evidence of it rather easily. As I have commented before, it's really funny/curious/ridiculous/a little sad to see full grown men walking around with their Viagra-induced hardons, trying to score a hookup. As someone else posted, Get a room.

But the gym is a perfect place to check people out, if happends with straights, gays, whomever. I prefer to just start up a conversation, exchange phone numbers and go from there.

I would say that Cyd is being pro-gay. Do you realize how the credibility of gays is hurt when people act like dogs in heat in the locker room? I have many straight friends at the gym and I've had them ask me why this occurs.

There's a time and a place for everything, and the gym shower isn't one of them for sex.

Amen to that.

I for one go to the gym to EXERCISE not to scope dick....take it home, where it belongs. wink

NJ

Aubie: I agree with you 100%. I belong to the local YMCA, which of course is supposed to be a "Christian" organization. Never the less, it is well known the suana can be very active there, and I have heard lots of "stories" about things that have taken place in the sauna.As said above, there is a time and place for everything but not there!! Take it home please.

I'm glad Cyd spoke up and complained about this to management. I totally agree with Aubie's dog in heat comments. For me, the locker room/shower is a place to change clothes and take a shower - maybe that's because I played sports in high school, and after practice the last thing on my mind was having sex in the shower. My local YMCA has its membership guidelines posted, and one of the rules is that sexual activity is prohibited. Any infraction will result in expulsion. I appreciated seeing that when I joined.

I assume that Gideon is saying Cyd should shower at home, right? Great tell the person who is NOT breaking the law that they should go elsewhere to participate in their legal activity. I am sick to death of going to my gym and having the steamroom closed because some losers insist it is somehow their birthright to suck dick wherever, whenever they want and everyone else just needs to deal with it.

I've heard a number of people defend this crap by saying "don't join a gay gym" or some such nonsense. While David Barton is basically a gay gym, I belong to New York Sports Club (not the Chelsea one) and this stuff goes on all the time. And I report it as often as I see it.

But do you actually see the act going on? I have never seen sex at the gym; there are signs that it might be happening, but that is close to just being speculation. Does pulling your towel over yourself when someone walks into the sauna suggests that you have been fooling around with someone else in the sauna? And if the activity is stopped upon your happening upon it, is it still offensive and out of place? There are men who just grope themselves all the time, are they making a pass? Or do they just have crabs or jock itch? I mean, I'm offended by the overtly predatory straight men and women displaying everything ON the gym floor--I want to tell them to get a hotel room as well.

And sex at the gym is not just a gay men thing. Straight men, however they want to define themselves, are doing it with other straight men, and or gay men.

[ January 08, 2005, 09:16 AM: Message edited by: shore ]

I've walked into the steamroom a number of times and caught one guy going down on another or a guy jerking off by himself and they don't even flinch. A couple of times I've sat down and started doing a fake "turned on" groan like Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. "Oh yeah dude suck his dick. Oh yeah that is so hot." The mocking tone usually gets them to knock it off.

This I have never seen.

Yes, it is still offensive and out of place. If someone wants to have sex in the locker room/shower room/sauna, go to a sex club. If someone wants to workout, go to a health club. Don't confuse the two. Men don't go to sex clubs to work out, so why should men go to health clubs to have sex.

If my health club had an area that was known to have sexual activity, I wouldn't even go there. Who wants to have to knock on the door to make sure nothing's going on before walking in? And worse, who wants to have to think about god knows what bodily fluids have been left behind? I pay to use the whole facility, and I don't feel it's OK for some to restrict access by using areas as their sex rooms. I don't care if the men (or women) involved are gay, straight, or anywhere in between, it's still offensive and out of place in a health club.

I think the person who started this thread owes Cyd an apology for deciding he's anti-gay.

I know we had an old thread about sex in the parks or whatever. I had this whole debate with some dolt who seemed to think that f**king in public is okay, and led to a post where I basically repeated the phrase "f**king in public" over and over to make a point. And that point is, it's NOT okay. And that includes a public gym, whether it's marketed to gays or in a gay neighborhood or whatever.

HA! I love it. You could also try, "What would your mother think if she saw you right now?"

Makes the case for shower shoes, alright.

Thought you all might like to see some of the responses I've gotten - people telling me that public gay sex is an "important" part of gay culture.

From "Tristan":
i suppose an argument can be made that everyone's opinion is, in some sense, valid. you certainly have a right to your viewpoint. but when you express a vehemently anti-gay sentiment in a gay newspaper you ought to be prepared for the consequences. whining about public sex being illegal isn't really the point. jaywalking is illegal too--have you ever done that? now why don't you get YOUR head out of your ass--or someone else's ass, whichever the case may be--and admit that you are actually homophobic.

More of the two or three dozen hate mails I have gotten from people who say public sex is their right:


They closed down a gay bar that always was and is now again a straight stripper bar by passing a law making it illegal for anyone to be seen in public anywhere in a "turgid" state, even under their clothes! Be glad you live in one of the gayest cities on earth....or MOVE, preferably to one of the RED states! ( I believe that's red for redneck!)

Sincerely ashamed of you,

Chuck

_______

i rarely write to uptight bitter separatist exclusionist self hating faggots about their tiny opinions, but your piece in the blade was really far too ignorant and dangerous to go without reply even from the most basic high school level journalistic point of view, you really oughtta get out more. if you've never been to a straight bar that promotes the amount of sex that nardicio encourages at his events, then you've never been to a titty bar. and in that case you should shut your fat hole.

i dunno what you think is goin on back there in the 'champage room' but it aint cristal.

and fyi, dickhead. sex doesn't spread stds. ignorance of the methods of transmission is how stds get their ugly head in the door. us dirty ass faggots have known for 25 years how you catch what and what you gotta do to get rid of, and that you can't get rid of. we're still alive and f**kin aint we?

your government aint doing enough. fool. any educated person can see that. schoolkids across america are taught that condoms will not prevent stds, for fear that the knowledge will encourage them to have sex. the true result is that, believing condoms useless anyway, they still have sex, but unprotected. the religious right has your education system by the throat.

if you saw on the website so clearly what was going on, why the f**k would you go if you knew that wasn't for you? we don't go to your 'the big chill' dvd release parties. dont come to our cocksuckin asslickin hotbody boozefests.

It seems so obvious, theres room for everyone. so f**k off. before you catch something.

Johnny Black

_______

I was very disappointed with the editorial you wrote in the Dec. 31st edition of the Blade. Sex clubs and parties are a part of the gay culture and should have never been shut down or harassed in the first place, such as during the 90's. We all know about praticing safe sex and how to prevent STD's.

Mr. Nardicio should be commended, not criticized, for standing up to the authorities and bringing back an important part of the gay lifestyle.

Finally, not that it is any of your business, but My life partner of ten years and I go to Nardicio parties and we get it off in public with each other because we think it's hot and it's no less safe than when we do it at home except when some high-minded, uptight, self-loathing 'public health advocate' like yourself goes about bashing the place.

You personally may be opposed to such things and that is your right; but, do not impose your principles on other people.

_______

Re your recent stand on the soap-box polemic regarding the parties and gyms that "promote" sex. There are some details you forgot to mention. You left out the part where the guy in the next stall held a gun to your head and made you suck that cock that (without provocation?, I think not) invaded your shower stall (you must be soooooo damn hot, by the way, to have all the guys at David Barton Gym cruising you).

Oh what? No gun? You didn't suck the cock? Well then, you chose not to have the sex then didn't you? Isn't that the choice we should all have? No at a Nardicio party is forced to do anything. It is an adult scenario, with adults that choose to be there, hell we PAY to be there!

You, nor anyone for that matter, are not in a position to make the moral choices for the community at large. If you don't like sexy parties, DON'T GO TO THEM. If you don't like sexy gyms, DON"T PAY A TON OF MONEY TO JOIN ONE!

From up on your moral highground can't you see the guys f**king on the subway? Why aren't you shutting down the MTA? Guys are f**king in the sanua at Columbia University, why don't you ask them to shut down the University? Guys are f**king in the Time Warner bathrooms, why not shut that Mall down?

Why pick on some small businesses that cater to a certain clientelle that like things a certain way? Why not crusade agains all things sexy? Why not work to make sex less lethal and let us go about enjoying it as much as possible in the meantime?

Public sex is not necessarily unsafe sex and it is never forced sex. If a club promoter celebrates sex, more power to him, and if he promotes GAY sex, well even more power to him! and more of my gay dollar! and you can go f**k yourself (in private of course, with the curtain pulled).

Shaun Fletcher

These idiots are comapring behavior at a gym with behavior at sex parties/clubs. Let's add these dolts to the People Who Should Be Shot thread.

Did Johnny Black write his letter on his MENSA stationery? What a moron! But this is the scariest line:

Yeah cuz I'm sure the guys I've walked in on in the steamroom are orally copulating with condoms on after comparing HIV test results.

I would be shocked, yes shocked, if a gym membership representative of any gym promoted the gym as a sex gym, as the anonymous man suggests in the article. Sex at public gyms is very different from sex in private clubs, isn't it? Is anyone trying to stop people from attending private parties? I didn't read Cyd's comments in that regard at all.

Party promoters in New York City are holding parties in bars - public places - and allowing and encouraging sex at the bars. The Department of Health is shutting them down because - as George said - PUBLIC SEX IS ILLEGAL.

...an "important part of the gay LIFESTYLE" huh?

Moron.

NJ

The bar I work in is, as anyone who has been there can attest, a very small one room bar. I've had a couple of instances where I've had to kick guys out for performing oral sex right out in the open. It was on very crowded nights like Halloween and Gay Pride when I guess they assumed (or at least hoped) the crowd would shield them. And the amazing thing is when they are caught, they actually give me attitude rather than even attempt to be contrite or embarrassed.

As a police officer I have to say - We don't go lookin for you - we have more important things to do but if you are seen having sex in a public place by us or an offended witness then you deserve a ticket- Gay or straight.

I agree with you Cyd. I hate watching two people all over each other in public, straight or gay. Take it home.

Okay, did anyone else giggle just a little when they read this part of the article? I mean come on... It's nuts??? This is a story about sex at the gym and Cyd says it's nuts..... LOL

In fact, Zeigler charges that they may actually “want to encourage this type of behavior. The way the showers are set up, it seems certainly designed to encourage this behavior,” he said. “It’s nuts.”

I work out at David Barton Gym as well. There is a shower "monitor" whi sits right outside the sauna, with a full view of the showers to make sue nothing goes on. Yet the shower stalls, while ostensibly private, are constructed with a six inch gap between the two walls, so whoever is in the adjoining shower can take a look, reach over, etc. The locker room is constructed in such a way that it creates a lot of little dressing areas rather than one large one, and sure enough if you use the two furthest ones you can find a couple of Muscle Marys having unprotected sex. The club claims to discourage this type of behavior, but they use provocative sexual images in their advertisingg, and offer classes like "Porn Star Abs." They've created a beautiful gym with great equipment, but they're alienating a lot of their members by trying to have it both ways. My understanding is a significant numbr of members have already canceled their memberships, and that a lot of the staff have had their hours reduced while others have been laid off. As for me, I tend to be in my own world at the gym, just focusing on my workout, and I don't use the sauna or steamroom. So while it's sometimes a bit disconcertig to stumble upon something inappropriate, I tend to just shrug it off and go on my way - but I can understand others being put off. After all, I'd be horrified and go run screaming naked down 23rd Street if I walked in on a straight couple having sex at the gym.

Cyd -- Did all of those people (or any) consent to your publishing their emails to you on a public website and using their names?

I don't think Cyd is anti-gay.

That said, there does appear to be a strain of prudery in some of the comments (not his, but others) I've seen about public sex. And let's not forget, not everybody has a home or his own bed(room), certainly not in New York City (or San Francisco, for that matter).

Personally seeing men having sex in a gym shower or bathroom doesn't bother me at all. In at least five gyms that I've belonged to, in New York or elsewhere, I've seen men having sex. Once, when I went to Bally's in DC with a friend's boyfriend, I became confused because the lockerroom and bathroom area seemed to be so much like a sauna or bathhouse I wasn't sure where I was. I'd say that if you know that a gym is permitting live sex acts and if you're loathe to happen upon the sex acts, either do not join that gym OR, if you do encounter them, look and walk away. (Even if the men are living examples of your fantasies.) If someone approaches you, tell them you're not interested. This always worked at a certain NY-area university gym I used to go to, where shower erections were quite common. Not far from the old David Barton site in Chelsea are a number of decent gyms, such as 24/7, which is filled with numerous extremely hot and gay guys who do not have sex there, though you might see them if you go to any of the numerous sex parties NYC offers. (The former owner of that gym even has a porn site.) Once upon a time, however, NYC offered numerous public venues for sex, but as with everything in our culture, the private sphere now holds sway. Sic transit gloria civitatis.

BTW, I believe the NYC Law is (or was) that no anal-genital acts were permitted, but other kinds of sex acts, like oral sex, masturbation and fisting were not banned, which is why J's Club, the Hellfire Club, the Lure and a few other places were able to allow these without getting shut down. (High rents, I believe, finally did that.) At Zone DK they were f*cking without condoms, using enemas, etc. Wild spot, by any measure.

Public sex: yes, it is illegal in some places, and yes, there are private, for-pay venues (from homes to video booths and bathhouses in many cities) where people who can PAY can have sex, but we cannot forget that laws against public sex, which are still on the books in many places, have often been used to target and harm gay men, many of them closeted. Rarely did teenage boys or straight men whoring in their cars have their names paraded in the newspaper like generations of often closeted men (and this was happening well into the 1990s.)

Thankfully the Supreme Court voided all laws against consensual PRIVATE sex between adults, and outside of venues where children may be present, such laws should be voided that prevent such activity in enclosed public venues like bars--that is, if the bars or gyms or any other business where children are not present allow such behavior. Chicago, to give one example, does allow backrooms for public sex, and the busybody Democratic Führer who runs the city does NOT feel the need to poke his nose (or the Police Department's collective flashlights) in them. Thus, a poor, closeted or curious guy who could not even afford a bar cover or a beer could conceivably waltz into one of these bars and find a willing partner or partners for (safe) sex. It's been known to happen.

[ January 08, 2005, 10:21 PM: Message edited by: fantomas ]

Throw a bunch of naked men in a locker room, assume 1 in 9 is gay, then act suprised and offended when two pair up.

As far as the law goes...an officer in St. Paul this week beat up this frail 80 year-old man. It is nice to hear that there are police that just give you a citation and do their job appropriately. If you want to have sex in public, you need to be willing to pay the consequences. Whether the penance be snickers or a citation.

Yes the glamorous clubs, I understand sex is just part of the scene to some. Factor in Allen dancing with his shirt off...someone is bound to start dry-humping. Yeah, I am posting this when I should be out clubbing and getting my freak on.

If you are a prude, admit it and go somewhere else. If you cannot deal with it. Ask yourself, "Do you really want sex to be a crime?". Approach the mates and ask them to help you legalize public sex. Then when legal you wil not be obligated to condemn it. You do not have to watch. If you are worried about disease, get an immune system.

I have had to tell a couple on the singletrack to watch out and not get it caught in my spokes. Because the guy was hung and he was turning toward me as I approached. Hey it is a multi-use trail :cool:

This has to be one of the most ignorant comments I have ever seen...anywhere.

If someone wants to run a legal sex club, then more power to them. Just don't call it a bar or dance club or gym and then try to turn it into something else by allowing such behavior. If you are so proud and happy with what you are doing, then why not go to the proper venue? I believe that consenting adults should be allowed to do almost anything they want to, just in the right place and time. If that makes me a prude, then so be it.

Purdue Fan, cruise the "scenes from the mat" thread before posting. Those cute little wrastlers adjusting themselves in singlets...that thread is so nawty. Then if you aren't sure phrase it as a question and ask. I assume that folks are much more knowledgeable when I post. My pretense, my bad.
Ignorance is lacking knowledge and experience. Someone with both will plainly tell you that maintaining your immune system is one of few productive things you can do to prevent disease in yourself.
You cannot control other's behavior. Stressing over someone else's public sex performance is just going to elevate your cortisol production. You will be at a higher risk to become infected if you chose to engage in risky behavior or not. You can drink Echinacea Gatorade and work out in a bubble, if your immune system isn't fit, you won't be fit for long.
The only way such gyms will change their marketing and practice is if it becomes unprofitable. The only constructive thing one can do is file a complaint. If it isn't taken seriously then patronize another gym. Or you could spray the fellas in the shower with a fire extinguisher, get sued or beat up. If you find a gym with your preference of testosterone you are better off.
Ignorant? No. I just do not need to rely on clubs for fitness or for sex. So I can afford to be terse and flippant about the thread. There really isn't enough love in the world. Seeing a little of it in the shower actually brightens my day. As long as I do not slip on it

Being a member of a large gym chain and at times using facilities in the Chelsea neighborhood, it seems pretty clear to me that a blind eye is turned to the activities in the wet areas of the gym. Ironically, the gay owner of a Boston mostly-gay gym, is adamant about not allowing such activities to be tolerated.

For many gay men, "gym" happens to be synonymous with "sex club" or "cruising spot". Agreed, many people socialize at gyms. However, that is not carte blanche for sex at the gym itself. Trading phone nos. and email addresses is a perfectly viable form of socializing at a gym; sex in the shower/wet areas however is not.

An opportunity to see another person naked is not an automatic permission slip to assume his/her sexuality or to make matters worse, approach him/her sexually. Yes, that also means that displaying one's own sexuality for that person to see while he/she showers is not ethically permissible. How can one assume that said clientele around you are comfortable with the sight of one stimulating oneself? Does it occur to this person that he/she may be offending them or making them extremely uncomfortable, not to mention breaking club or local rules about sexual behavior?

Cyd is dead-on right for complaining about such behavior as is anyone else who witnesses it. Being gay or having membership at a gym that markets itself to gay men does not mean you can have sex at that location!

If guys not having a home or his own bedroom to have sex in is an excuse for sex in public gyms, then perhaps these guys should cancel their gym memberships and get their priorites in order by using that money for things that might be a tad more important like rent. And it is not our responsibilty to help accomodate some closeted guys by providing them with a gym to have sex in. Not when there are booth stores, sex parties and other such venues. My right to use my gym (which I pay over $80 a month for) for working out far supercedes some other guy's right to get his rocks off.

Oral sex in public places (including clubs like the ones you mentioned) is most definitely illegal in NYC.


This has to be the single dumbest, most ignorantly moronic statement ever posted here at Outsports.

Although I should not be surprised by the fact that there is actually an argument over this issue of public sex, I can not help but be disappointed in the extreme.

Somehow advocating sexual activity in public places just doesn't make a sound position to take for a healthy life. What does such activity say about the self-respect, self-image, and dare I say it, self-morality of an individual?

Are not our bodies and very lives worth enough to express such intimate aspects of our sexualities in safe, positive environments such as a bedroom, home, or other personal spaces? Sans the affectionate kiss, hand holding, hug, must we endure coming upon some guy servicing another in a venue not meant for such activity and accept it as "normal gay behavior"?

Must we legitimize such activity to be " a very important part of gay life" by saying "get your head out of your ass, just don't join that gym or use that bathroom. or just walk away" cause that's just the way gay men behave?

What does this perspective mean? As a gay man, I and other gay men are nothing but snibbling rutting pigs who can not control our insatiable lust? See a hot body, screw decency, my desire is more important than decency and just do it? After all, we're gay, and we all do it, and screw scoiety and their rules, I'm gay.. is that the ticket? Ahhh, that's right, we're sexual outlaws thumbing our noses and fists to the mainstream hetrosexual society and their mores?

Bull !!!! Bad Behavior is Bad Behavior, PERIOD.

For those who want to tell me to "get over it", I say to you... GET A ROOM AND GET A BETTER LIFE.

For the Record since copman mentioned it.

In Texas: Public Lewdness is a Class A misdemeanor and can result in an arrest. If found guilty, the violation can garnish a $4,000 fine and/or up to a year in the country jail (lets not discuss what might happen once you get there, that's another thread.)

[ January 09, 2005, 09:04 AM: Message edited by: satxbuddy1 ]

Some VERY GOOD comments here, from Aubie, VKGeorge, Cyd and others, better expressing what I tried to in another thread concerning the issue of public promiscuity and how it hurts our image and fight for equality.

The argument was actually advanced about 20 years ago by more than a few gay lawyers in SF in connection with the controversy over closing the bathhouses there that to do so would violate our I Amdt free speech rights, since these are "public fora" in the "gay community" worthy of constitutional protection. My objections that such theories were unrealistic and counterproductive to our social image were ignored or condescendingly dismissed as "prudish." Many, but not most, of the same lawyers who held this position then carried this illogical, intellectually hamstrung, baggage into the struggle for equal rights and now, "gay marriage," with, as we've seen, predictable success.

The rest have since died of AIDS.

I've seen some hot gay sex acts in gyms and Y's over the years, and I thank the men who performed those activities. Sometimes there is nothing hotter than watching muscle guys get it on at the gym after pumping iron.

If I don't like the guys who are doing the sex, I simply don't look.

Myself, I think I've engaged in same sex activities only at gyms in SF and DC, and I'm glad I did.

It was just the release I needed after a workout and no one objected.

[ January 09, 2005, 02:28 PM: Message edited by: MPetrelis ]

Just for your information, it is not public sex or private sex or sex in general between homosexuals or straights or bisexuals that leads to AIDS, but UNSAFE SEX. UNPROTECTED SEX can lead to AIDS, not all sex--whether it occurs in bathhouses or parks or in the privacy of one's bedroom. Certainly you know this as well as anyone else here.

Also, when queers were almost completely in the closet (in the early part of the 20th century, or during the Colonial Era), that did NOT stop anti-gay sex fanatics from attacking us. Not one bit. Because those who hate gays will always find some reason to oppress us. While those who are tolerant and open and humane and merciful and understanding realize that we are all HUMAN BEINGS and someone else's behavior, if it is not directly harming others, is her or his business. They can see this in Canada, in Spain, in France, in Germany, etc., and one of these days, our full equality and human rights in the United States of America will not hinge on some fanatic's frothing about some perceived problem with SOME--not all--gay people's behavior, public or private.

Perhaps one day you will comprehend that NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO to try and please them, to mimic them, to make them like you, the anti-gay fanatics, the Fred Phelpses and Phyllis Schlaflys and Rick Santorums and Jerry Falwells, will still hate you and seek to oppress you in any way they can. The sickness is theirs, not ours.

I am by no means a prude...ask my bf. The gym isn't YOURS to use as you please. It's for all of the other members. We eat dinner in the same restaurant almost everynight and a Y director is one of our regular buds that eats at the bar with us. He is constantly getting complaints from the straight members about sex in the locker room. He says these aren't vitriolic in nature...it's more, we hate to come to you with this, but it's getting out of hand. Come on guys, I don't want to have someone my Dad's age have to ask for homosexual activity be ceased so he can take a shower at the gym.

Most of the replies on here that seem to think it is ok to have sex in gyms live in large metropolitan areas. Well, hell, guys, in Chelsea in NYC, you are the ones that are naive. You can walk down the street holding hands, kissing, etc. and no one is going to notice. Last time we were in NYC, we were talking from down 7th from the hotel to Whole Foods and straight guy had a huge boner in sweat pants and his girlfriend was laughing...others didn't even look. Y'all are much more isolated than we are.


It's those of us out here in the rest of America that's having to change the minds of those who don't like or understand us. I can tell you one thing, it makes our jobs a hell of a lot harder if they just saw two guys sucking each other off in our gym owned by the Baptist Health Systems.

[ January 09, 2005, 03:30 PM: Message edited by: Aubie in Bham ]

Bar = a place I go to drink and socialize.
Gym = a place I PAY to workout, and take a shower if I have to.
Sexclub = a place people should go if they want to have public sex.
Your house = the place you go to have PRIVATE sex.

I don't give a phuk if you want to have sex in a SEX club or in your home. But I pay money to use the gym. If you are paying a membership fee to my gym so that you can lurk the showers and have sex, then you are pissing me off (and I WILL turn you in). A gym is NOT a sex club...or your bedroom.

The radical fairies and trolls are an unfortunate, toxic side effect of the "gay movement."

And Cyd - I totally support you posting those emails, despite the comments of Mr. 4th-Post-on-Outsports from New Joisey. You have summarized my long standing feelings on this issue and I applaud you for it.

Is it okay to smoke pot in public? Some people think it should be legal, and they say, "who's it hurting. We should be able to do it." But in general we don't allow smoking pot in public. Is there a right to smoke pot?

I ask simply because I see a parallel between sex in public and smoking pot--those who do it think it should be allowed. Those who don't, think it shouldn't be allowed.

[ January 09, 2005, 04:44 PM: Message edited by: shore ]

Well here in Dallas they have a place called The Club, which is both. So they do readily confuse the two. They advertise a large full size gym, etc etc, but its known to be a bath house aka sex club.

Marijuana possession itself is against the law, so it doesn't matter where it's smoked.

You know, its interesting....they have a "Club" in Houston too....same sort of deal.

I was considering leaving my old gym and looking for a new one. A friend of mine told me I should try it out because they have great equipment and nobody uses it....so I went one day after work on a day pass.

The front desk attendant was rude...he apparently wasn't happy with me because I didn't know the "motions"....I had to ask where the locker room was and where I could get a gym towel. :confused:

The place was very clean and my friend was right, the equipment was new and appeared hardly used at all. The locker room lights were dimmed so low, that I could barely see the numbers on the lockers and playing on TV screens all around this changing area were gay porn videos.

I was in the work out area for about 2 hours (I did an hour of cardio on a treadmill) and counted only 2 other men come into the "gym". Neither worked out, rather they came and stood near where I was I running and made attempts to get me to look @ them. I kept my eyes straight ahead looking out toward and outdoor pool...where a few naked men were swimming....and it was like 50 degrees and raining that day.

A hallway between the pool area and the gym apparently led to where all the "action" was because there was a non-stop stream of short, fat, unattractive trolls who had never seen the inside of a gym in their lives kept walking back and forth either nude or in towels....nobody made eye contact with anyone else.....even the people that worked there wouldn't look me in the eye.

I left without touring any of the other areas of the place.....I did go back into the locker room to change and found a "couple" sorta making out right in front of my locker.....I sort of gave them a "if you don't move, I will hurt you" look and they promptly left the locker area...

It really was a shame, cuz the gym was great....but I won't be back. I suppose if that's what you wanna do...fine, do it...but don't expect me to condone it or want to be a part of it....and I think the owners of these places might as well just be blunt and say...."our gym is a front, we really are nothing more then a sex-club.

NJ

Is this true even in states where medical marijuana has been permitted by referendum or law? Where's federalism when we need it?

The problem of sex in the gym is taking care of itself. I choose not to affect the outcome either way. All is does is bring my psychophysiological experience down. When you are in the zone it doesn't matter. All which was alluded to in previous posts. Being in a gym brings me down as it is.

While I cannot defend sex in a public facility like a health club, a private party is an entirely different matter. If the owner of a club or bar wants to have a sex party, that is his or her right. The City has no business interfering in private parties in a club or bar--provided all the guests are consenting adults of legal age. Even more objectionable is the legal sophistry and petit-bourgeois moralizing that accompanies these crusades for sexual temperance.

The question that needs to be asked is "What is the real motive for these closures?" It can’t possibly be to help stop the spread of AIDS. The number of people infected with AIDS by being raped in city facilities such as Rikers Island or Spofford is probably double the number of all those infected in all the bathhouses of NYC. This inconvenient little fact is always glossed over by self-appointed guardians of public morality. They prefer to engage in sanctimonious and salacious moralizing about bathhouses and sex, rather than make real efforts to address the AIDS crisis.

If the City were really interested in controlling the spread of AIDS (not to mention hepatitis and drug-resistant tuberculosis), it would do things like clean up homeless shelters (another frequent venue for rapes), getting the mentally ill off the streets, institute needle exchange programs, and provide comprehensive drug treatment on demand.

I never said I have sex at a gym.
I do push ups at home because I
am not like your average gay guy
on this site who can blow his pay
check on lifting weights. I can't
afford a gym and I wouldn't want
to shower in front of a bunch
of strange guys anyway. I would
shower at home because people piss
in the shower and that is gross.
But they do it so why stress.

That's what I said to Cyd. If you
people who rip on "trolls and fairies"
weren't so body obsessed this wouldn't
even be a probelm. I can't wait until
some of you turn 30 and feel old. You
guys are gonna hate life. I can't wait
to be old. Today your a twink but
tommorrow your a troll. Sweeet.

I don't owe Cyd anything for speaking
my mind. He likes the attention
anyway. Showers at a gym is not like
showering in prison. Be free.

Possibly true but has little to do with sex in gym showers. Sounds like a long-way-around justification to me.

I worked at a Ballys here in Minneapolis when I first moved here. And this place was infamous for closet cases and gay guys having sex in the gym. I hated it. I'm there at the gym to work out. That's it. If I wanted to have sex, I could get a guy's phone number and have him come over to my place.

I caught a lot of guys fooling around at that gym and I just started yelling at them. Since I was the only openly gay guy working at that Ballys, having those morons fool around there, would be a bad reflection on me, since I am the only openly gay guy working there.

Hell, if someone wants to fool around at a gym, go to Steamworks or Flex and do it, don't do it at the local Ballys or any other gym.

When I went over to the "gay gym" (The Firm), I wasn't working there, but I worked out there. And I did the exact same thing. I yelled at them. It is a place to workout, not to jerk off and get your cock sucked. Go do it at home!

At the gym I've been going to for two years, I don't have to worry about it at all. It's a predominantly straight gym. The locker rooms are too dank to even want to fool around. You'd probably get athlete's foot if you walked barefoot in the locker room. I'm there at my gym to work out, get a good pump and go home.

Cyd, great article! I'm glad you wrote something about it.