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I was busy
Christmas-party-hopping this afternoon, so I missed some of
the games. Still, I did get to have some cornish game
hen and almond cake. Damn, we gays certainly can cook
. . .
A reader e-mailed us last
week and told us that our comments are like "Beavis and
Butthead Do The NFL." My only question was, which
of us is Butthead? Jim told me that he was, because
Beavis smokes more crack - surely an allusion to my
"crack picks," like picking the Titans to finish
fourth in the AFC Central with a record of 8-8 at
best. I guess he had the last laugh . . .
Jim calls the Pittsburgh
Steelers "likable" in his rankings. I
couldn't agree more. While I want Baltimore to win the
division, there's something about the Steelers that makes me
want to see them do well. When the fans were booing Kris
Brown as he lined up for a late field goal, Kordell
Stewart was on the sidelines cheering for his teammate,
against his home crowd. That kind of true camaraderie
is great to see.
On the flip side, I just
can't stop cheering against the St. Louis Rams.
What the hell was the ridiculous "fake time out"
they pulled in the first quarter against the Niners?
Why would you do that? Why not save it for a fourth
quarter, or playoff? The Titans ran the Music City
Miracle when they needed it, but the Rams run these bullshit
plays all the time. I hope they lose every game and Mike
Martz is fired.
The Patriots are 8-5
and, right now, would be the fifth seed in the AFC playing Baltimore
in the first round.
The Washington Redskins
are 6-6 and in eighth place in the NFC. In Week 16,
they play at the New Orleans Saints - and that game
could be to decide the sixth seed in the NFC. Go
figure.
The Pats' coach, Bill
Bellichick, now joins 'Skins' coach Marty
Schottenheimer on my very short list for coach of the
year. If I had to round out a top five, I'd go with Steve
Mariucci (Niners), Dan Reeves (Falcons), and Butch
Davis (Browns).
I now want to see the Detroit
Lions go 0-15. That will make their final game, at
home against the Dallas Cowboys, a potentially
historic game.
My Five Favorite Teams Right
Now: 1) New England Patriots (that's not changing); 2)
Baltimore Ravens; 3) Oakland Raiders; 4) Washington
Redskins; 5) Minnesota Vikings.
My Five Least Favorite Teams
Right Now: 5) New York Jets; 4) Buffalo Bills; 3)
Tennessee Titans; 2) Green Bay Packers (I've hated them
since they beat the Pats in the Super Bowl); 1) St. Louis
Rams (that's not changing, either)
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Four teams asserted themselves
as the season reached the three-quarter pole:
--The St. Louis Rams showed they are the class
of the NFC West with an easy 27-14 win over the San
Francisco 49ers. The Niners were never in the game and the
Rams look like NFC home field is theirs for the taking.
--Green Bay’s 17-7 win over Chicago proved
the Pack is back and will make the playoffs. If they can win
the division and get a bye, a trip to the NFC title game
would be a good bet. The Bears do not impress me on
offense--what a boring game plan they have. They have the
look of a one-and-done playoff team.
--Pittsburgh went to 10-2, a record not seen
since the Super Bowl days of 1978. Kordell Stewart is
playing at a high caliber and the defense is first-rate. But
kicker Kris Brown scares me. He missed two field
goals and an extra point Sunday, and was the same guy who
missed four kicks against Baltimore.
--New England is red-hot, having won 8 of 11.
The Pats--with games left against Buffalo (2-10), Carolina
(1-11) and Miami (8-3) seem a sure bet for the playoffs.
Once in they will be scary, a well-coached team playing with
confidence.
The Raiders defense
continues to be soft as pudding, giving up 447 yards to the
hapless Chiefs and nearly blowing an 11-point lead. Oakland
may have peaked already.
As for Cyd being Butthead and
me Beavis (see left), need I remind him that he GUARANTEED
the San Diego Chargers would make the playoffs. At
5-8, I don't think so.
A whistle blown in the stands
stopped play in the Oakland-Kansas City game after
the Chiefs had downed a punt in the second half. The
confused officials, thinking one of their own had blown the
whistle, made the Chiefs re-kick. The result this time was a
88-yard punt return by the Raiders’ Tim Brown. It
was a critical play in a game the Raiders won by only two
points. That fan should get a game ball from the Raiders.
The best free agent pickup
this past offseason may have been running back Priest
Holmes of Kansas City. He was awesome Sunday, with 277
total yards. He now has has 1,146 rushing yards, 489
receiving yards and eight TDs.
What a difference a year
makes. These playoff teams from a year ago aren’t going
anywhere this season: Minnesota (5-7), New York
Giants (5-7), Tennessee (5-7) and Indianapolis
(4-8).
Hottest player of the day?
Try the injured Ed McCaffrey. ESPN did a sideline
interview and with his great face, goofy haircut and
articulate manner, Ed is the kind of guy who you’d like to
take home to mom. Does he have a gay twin somewhere?
Can anybody kick? We saw a
bunch of chip-shot field goals missed Sunday. The worst was
by Paul Edinger of the Bears, who so badly shanked a
21-yarder that I thought he was using an artificial leg.
Winning quarterbacks on
Sunday included Todd Bouman (Minnesota), Quincy
Carter (Dallas), Alex Van Pelt (Buffalo) and Tom
Brady (New England). Not exactly Unitas, Montana,
Namath and Bradshaw.
Top 5: 1. St. Louis
(hard to beat if they play turnover-free). 2. Pittsburgh
(becoming a very likeable and watchable team). 3. Green
Bay (Maybe Ahman Green really is Batman). 4. New
England (Pats playing as well as anyone). 5. Oakland
(Rich Gannon is the guy holding this team together.)
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Aaron
Brooks, quarterback of the New Orleans Saints, has a
ton of talent but had been inconsistent this season. He
was great on Sunday in a big 28-10 win at Atlanta. Brooks
was 20 for 30 for 279 yards and one touchdown. More
importantly, he threw no interceptions and the Saints
(7-5) kept their playoff chances alive.