How We Saw Week 15

Saints coach Jim Haslett wasn’t chuckling.  After the referees gave the Saints a much-delayed 15-yard “unsportsmanlike” penalty, Haslett confronted Horn on the sideline.  Haslett later said, "Obviously he'll be fined for it, and he should be fined for it.”

Why?  Whom did the prank hurt?  He didn’t make a threatening gesture to anyone; he didn’t offend anyone; he didn’t attack anyone.  He’s not Mark Madsen, for crying out loud – the guy showed some style.

I can completely understand why the throat-slashing gesture has been banned from the NFL:  it’s mean, threatening, and incites violence.  I can agree with the League that gestures directed negatively toward a player or anyone else should be discouraged with fines.  But, some guy making a phone call?  Shaking pom-poms?  Dancing with his teammates? 

Horn’s actions led Tony Kornheiser to declare on Monday’s Pardon The Interruption that Joe Horn’s celebration embarrassed himself and “made a mockery of the NFL.”

How is it that these grown men, making millions of dollars a year, are still crybabies at heart? 

I distinctly remember watching an Oakland Raiders game a couple years ago.  In this particular game, Tim Brown made his 1,000^th career reception.  The officials stopped the game, his family came out onto the field, and we all got to watch a good 10 minutes of Brown crying about his accomplishment.

The League rejoiced in it, of course, taking part in the celebration – a celebration that stopped a game for several minutes.  No delay of game flag was thrown.

Same thing when Cris Carter caught his 1,000^th ball.  Same thing when Emmitt Smith broke Sweetness’s rushing record.

If the League is so adamant that celebrating is bad for the League, should they have fined the Raiders for Brown’s celebration?  Should Smith have been suspended for a game?

The League seems to be threatened by diversification.  They want each player to be a straight-laced (in more ways than one) clone of Barry Sanders.  What they refuse to embrace is the idea that the post-touchdown actions of both Barry Sanders and Deion Sanders have something to offer. 

While TJ Duckett won’t get fined, he got some harsh words from ESPN’s Sean Salisbury for doing a little jig in the end zone after he scored Atlanta’s only touchdown against the Colts.  The Falcons had been down, 31-0, late in the third quarter before Duckett’s score.

Sunday night, Salisbury launched into an attack on Duckett’s mini-celebration, saying that, when you’re down, 31-0, you shouldn’t be celebrating.

Sure, it probably wouldn’t matter in the game – but, when you’re getting killed on the road and you need to ignite a fire in your team, that’s EXACTLY when you should do a little shuffle.  Shake things up.  Have some fun with it.  Your coach got left the team the week before and your now being coached by Wade Phillips.  Heck, that’s reason enough to break out a bottle of scotch and do an Irish jig. 

Sunday also featured guys leaping into the stands, dancing with teammates, and holding up signs begging the League to forgo another fine from celebration.

During all of it, Chris Berman was leading a celebration of the capture of Saddam Hussein.  The commentators followed suit, talking about how it was a great day for mankind.  The Three Chuckleheads calling the game for ESPN were also talking about what a great day for America it was.

Then, after the out-of-place patriotic cheerleading, they lambasted Horn for celebrating a touchdown.  It seems these “experts,” in trying to position themselves as true football scholars, have forgotten the E in the Entertainment and Sports Programming Network.

What would have happened if Horn had reached under the goal post and pulled out an American flag?  Or, what if he had called his buddy serving in Iraq to let him know that he had scored a touchdown for him? 

It would have been fun hearing Joe Theisman try to explain away his criticism of Joe Horn then.

To all of those impressionable young players just entering the League, I say, “go forth and celebrate!”  And take these ideas for your own:

-          Grab the soda tray from the concessions guy in the stands and start handing out refreshments;

-          Use a cell phone, except this time call the safety you just beat and leave him a message thanking him for his part in your touchdown;

-          Run over to the sideline and be the first person ever to give himself a Gatorade bath.

-          Get a life-sized stand-up cut-out of the Coors twins and parade them around on either side of you like you’re showing up to the Oscars;

-          Have a couple teammates pull out Polaroid cameras and start flashing away like paparazzi, handing out the photos to fans in the stands.

Simply for mentioning these ideas, I’m sure I’ll get some fine from the League.

The Fun Bunch ain't welcome here anymore.

--It seems that NFL refs have it in for the Seattle Seahawks. In November, the Seahawks lost a game at Baltimore after officials failed to run off about 40 seconds off the clock in the final minute. The Ravens wound up winning in overtime and the NFL later apologized for screwing up.

On Sunday, against the St. Louis Rams, the refs were at it again. With the Rams leading, 27-22 and about 30 seconds left, Seattle quarterback Matt Hasselbeck threw deep to receiver Bobby Engram, who looked open. Engram, though, tripped over back judge Greg Steed, who had fallen and was rolling. The pass was incomplete and Seattle wound up losing. Steed got up and said "my fault" to Engram. "It's just a real bad break for us," Hasselbeck said.


--New Orleans Saints receiver Joe Horn was ripped after scoring a touchdown--by his coach. Horn whipped out a cell phone that was stuck inside the padding of a goal post and made a call after catching a second-quarter touchdown pass against the New York Giants. His coach, Jim Haslett, was not please: "It was uncalled for," Haslett told ESPN before the start of the second half. "We don't do that here. Obviously he'll be fined for it, and he should be fined for it."

Expect Horn to get a contract to do those "10-10" commercials.

--The Minnesota Vikings have now gone 2-6 after starting 6-0. Their latest belly flop occurred in Chicago, where they lost to a rookie quarterback (Rex Grossman), 13-10. Minnesota had a chance to win late when Randy Moss had his hands on a touchdown pass in the end zone. Before he could gain control, though, Bear defensive back Charles Tillman stripped it out of his hands for an interception.

--Mike Martz continues to be baffling when using his instant replay challenges. The latest came Sunday when he challenged the spot of a short Seattle gain in the first period. It was a dumb challenge since a team only gets two per game. This is the same Martz who will use all his timeouts in the third period. It smacks of arrogance and might be the kind of thing that haunts the Rams in the playoffs.

On the plus side, the Rams have won six in a row and have clinched the NFC West. I’d be surprised if the Rams fail to at least make the conference championship game.

--Strange sight: I saw three punters make touchdown saving tackles. The guys who were caught—and will get ribbed by their teammates for being tackled by a kicker—were Nate Clemens of Buffalo, Dante Hall of Kansas City and Dennis Northcutt of Cleveland.

--By winning Sunday, the Cincinnati Bengals need only one win in their last two games to have their first winning season since 1991. Marvin Lewis should be coach of the year for taking such a woebegone franchise this far this fast.

--Kansas City stomped Detroit by 28, but their run defense is still suspect. A week after Denver’s Clinton Portis scored five touchdowns against them, Chiefs defenders allowed the little-known Shawn Bryson gain 105 and a touchdown.

--So much for the theory that Michael Vick’s return would make it all well in Atlanta. Vick looked like a rookie in getting drilled at Indianapolis and the Falcons defense is horrible. The new Falcons coach will have a major rebuilding job on his hands.