http://www.outsports.com/os Sat, 21 Nov 2009 06:10:45 +0100 FeedCreator 1.7.3 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc76 Great read. Perfect feather in the cap for the City of Brotherly Love. All the best to him and his husband. sportinlife Mon, 27 Apr 2009 17:46:34 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc77 Awesome story! Mike Mon, 27 Apr 2009 18:45:16 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc78 I was having a bad Monday and then I read this story and it put me in a much better mood. Brian Sims is a big, hunky, motivated guy. Lets hope we get to the point soon that an average 'mo who's just minding his own business, paying his/her taxes and staying out of trouble will be given the same level of support and respect that Brian was shown. Kev Mon, 27 Apr 2009 18:53:46 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc79 Brian, What an inspiration you are to countless GLBT young men and women everywhere! You tore down a wall of misconceptions about assumptions of individuals. You also continue to provide leadership to your peers. Thank you and continued success to you! BigBlueCowboy (Matt) Mon, 27 Apr 2009 22:19:17 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc80 I still get teary and full of brotherly feelings when I read stories like this.Maybe kids won't hang themselves so often if guys like Brian get more visibility. Bless him. LACharlie13 Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:19:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc81 That 3rd paragraph from the end of the story is seriously as articulate as I wish I could be with peeps that disagree with gay marriage. Totally inspirational and definitely love the courage of both Sims and his teammates. Steve in Hermosa Beach Tue, 28 Apr 2009 04:17:08 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc82 Howdy howdy howdy, Brian, I'm a quarterback! Sack me, mister! What a hunk. A Reader Tue, 28 Apr 2009 04:22:08 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc83 Brian you've come a long way over the years. I'm so proud of the man you've become & the path you're leading. This is a great article. And I'm glad you're able to share your story. I wish you nothing but the best. :) Lauren K. Tue, 28 Apr 2009 09:33:40 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc84 What a wonderful and inspirational story. Maybe the "christians" ought to read and heed -brotherly love--Yea God Francis Tue, 28 Apr 2009 13:22:03 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc85 It's comforting to hear that there are still nice people out there that are accepting of different life styles, especially in the sports scene. Glad to hear that everything turned out great for you Brian. Anthony V. Tue, 28 Apr 2009 15:15:10 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc86 [color=fuchsia] you're the sexiest gay man alive! sorry we won't be having children together :( love you big guy!![/color] :kiss: patty Tue, 28 Apr 2009 21:08:48 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc87 [quote=LACharlie13]I still get teary and full of brotherly feelings when I read stories like this.Maybe kids won't hang themselves so often if guys like Brian get more visibility. Bless him.[/quote] I'm glad I'm not the only one... and the line about the buddies throwing the bigot out of the bar had me chuckling out loud... Yes, we do, still, have a long ways to go... but hearing stories like this makes me feel it isn't a long as I once feared. As a 'die-hard' pessimist... this did touch me. Thanks for sharing the story. Peace Lee E Tue, 28 Apr 2009 22:03:22 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc88 Cyd, thank you for this story. It made me laugh and almost cry. Your website is really so much more than just pics of half naked hot jocks (which I do love!). I hope that people of all ages who may be questioning or struggling with their sexuality can find their way to Outsports before it's too late. I wish I could have seen stories like Brian's and countless others when I was struggling to come out. Brian, keep up the amazing work. You are obviously a strong minded person with a great future ahead of you. Tim in NYC Wed, 29 Apr 2009 00:32:10 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc89 it's a shame that such a great story was so poorly written. Wed, 29 Apr 2009 04:38:25 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc90 This is a great story, I wish there were more like this. S Taylor Wed, 29 Apr 2009 07:55:19 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc91 I'm not gay and none of my friends are but I played against this guy for his last 2 years in the league and he was unstoppable. My coaches talked about him every year and every year he ran right over us. I remember him being a nice guy too. DovaPA80 Wed, 29 Apr 2009 09:14:20 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc93 This is definitely an incredible situation... I was not openly gay, but was the captain of my college track team. I had the same fears as Sims and tried to hide everything from my team. I also lived with 5 guys on my team and had a boyfriend during my last semester of college. Not only was I the captain of the track team, I was also the elected student athete rep of the entire university. Looking back on the situation, I wish something like this had happened to me. It's unfortunate that these stories are only published in literature such as Out Magazine or Outsports. The general public needs to see more of this. In fact, I was the second closeted gay captain of my track team in 4 years... Eric Wed, 29 Apr 2009 09:22:44 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc94 Somthing that isn't in the story (that may have made his teammates much more likey to accept him) is what a geniunely great, down to earth guy Brian is. Larry Wed, 29 Apr 2009 11:02:37 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc95 Would Logo please make a TV movie about this guy?!? Ben Wed, 29 Apr 2009 11:32:36 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc96 You hit it right on the head, Ben. This guys is a smart, athletic, good looking guy and he's got one heck of an incredible story! I wanna hear more about him! Why isn't everyone covering this??? MarkJett Wed, 29 Apr 2009 14:16:25 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc98 Heh, I clicked this article because it looked interesting, and it was -- and I was surprised to find out it was right in Bloomsburg, only one or two exits away from me on the interstate! Bloom is one of the colleges at which a good percentage of my high school's graduates matriculate, including two of my first cousins, and I had never heard about this! Having grown up in the area, I can attest to its widespread homophobia, and it was nice to read that Brian had such a good experience -- even if it did take him being a 260-lb. football player to avoid being harassed. ;) Colin Wed, 29 Apr 2009 16:44:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc99 What a fantastic example of what one can do to change this world one person at a time... no big parade, no big demonstration... And we, gay men and women, have that individual power. Michel in Montreal Michel Filion Wed, 29 Apr 2009 17:43:27 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc100 Just a great story... and very refreshing to see such a butch guy like that. However, if he was not such a tough player, would things be different? I would hope not! Dave Wed, 29 Apr 2009 17:47:49 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc101 I kept reading this waiting for something horrible to happen. I hate that I'm conditioned to do this. How refreshing to read such an uplifting profile. Jeremy Wed, 29 Apr 2009 18:26:32 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc102 Hearing such a story is all the validation I need. Back in the later 70's, in a very hostile enviornment & time, I stood up for myself as a gay boy. I marched down the street & gathered in the Rallies, with the news cameras zooming in, and it was scarey then. Mind you I am 5'5" and 120lb., so the chances of getting the crap beat out myself was very real,but, I did it. If what I did back then, in anyway, helped pave the path for this wonderful man; I'm so glad I did. booka Wed, 29 Apr 2009 18:31:04 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc103 I checked out a few sports sites to see if this was getting other coverage. One guy on a football site wrote: "I doubt he would remember me, but Brian was a classmate of mine at BU. We graduated the same year. It was probably 2 or 3 years after graduation that I learned of this story and that he opened up to his teammates during his senior season. It certainly didn't change my opinion of him. He is a really exceptional guy. Extremely intelligent, articulate, personable, kind. Believe me, there are lot of superlatives you can use to describe him. He was a big man on campus, but you would never know that talking to him. He also happened to be a pretty good football player and great leader. He has gone on to have a successful career in law and remains very active in Bloom alumni functions. I've seen him at a lot of games over the last several years." Wow - this sounds like a really great guy! Ed NorthEast8443 Wed, 29 Apr 2009 18:52:21 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc104 Brian is one of the most motivated and genuine people whom I had the pleasure of teaching in law school and I am honored to call him one of my best friends in the years since. And he has the coolest Celtic tattoo in the world! ;-) Deborah Wed, 29 Apr 2009 19:04:29 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc105 Worth reading. Glad Sims is doing good work as a lawyer. Good for him. Glenn I Wed, 29 Apr 2009 20:12:44 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc106 This is a wonderful example of how much difference one person can make by coming out. Matt Wed, 29 Apr 2009 20:49:17 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc107 I honestly think the real hero was the guy who spoke honestly about Brian ('outed' him). Even Brain would have to admit that it freed him. Brian: "I cared that my team would still be comfortable around me. I was concerned that in the locker room guys would be uncomfortable around me." That is the exact argument used to support DADT. Does Brian care about those soldiers who might disagree with the homosexual lifestyle and feel uncomfortable around his type? Garyf Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:06:13 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc108 "About four years ago, Sims brought his now-fiance to a team reunion. Both of them were accepted with open arms. Sims said he "lost track of him halfway through the night because he was off with half of the football team getting bombed somewhere." Bookey Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:38:14 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc109 HOT! So cool to have a role model who is not your typical limp-wristed, mincing faggot. Brain Sims earned the respect of his teammates without forcing his lifestyle on them. Dudes were surprised because he is a real man, not some Richard Simmons fruity type that no one wants in the locker room. You rock dude! Curt Wed, 29 Apr 2009 22:52:09 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc110 Great story and another affirmation that being gay and masculine is the norm. We never hear about the high school guys that know they are gay, but easily mix with the rest of the high school population. I would say this is probably the most common experience for many. Nice to have a guy like this be one of us. Kudos! Wed, 29 Apr 2009 23:24:48 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc111 Just proves that straight guys [i]aren't[/i] bothered by sexual orientation. [i]What bothers them is gender identity. [/i] You can be into dudes but being fem is not cool. Mark Wed, 29 Apr 2009 23:36:40 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc112 Accept others as they are & don't put people in boxes. I'd love it if I looked & acted like Sean Connery (in fact I'd LOVE IT if every guy I had to deal w/looked like Sean too), but the fact is I'm not Sean & that should be just fine. I shouldn't have to fit into some gender mold to be treated w/respect. If Brian didn't look & act the jock stereotype this story might have easily had a much sadder ending & a much more typical plot of discrimination & harassment. Humanity is beautifully diverse & people threatened by a limp wrist seem as self-hating as any homophobe that thinks that being gay is contagious. Joel Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:21:02 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc113 Wow, I am so happy to hear everything worked out! I am from PA too, near Philly, so hearing this makes me proud to be from that area too. My boyfriend is also an athlete, his coming out was a little rocky, but that was when he found out who his true friends were. Anyways, I wish Mr. Sims and his husband the very best, you are an inspiration to us all. Jon Salacuse Thu, 30 Apr 2009 10:23:03 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc115 I wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for the kind words shared on here and to everyone who has contacted me personally. As I've said to some of you, the response has been pretty overwhelming. In the days since the article was posted, I've received emails from about two dozen states in the U.S. and about a dozen countries! I'm hearing from other gay high school and college athletes, from parents, coaches, teachers, writers, and seniors. Everything has been positive, everything has been supportive, and most importantly, everything has been very familiar. There are a lot of lgbt athletes - current and former. It's very humbling for me to know that so many people were impacted by this story and I want for everyone to know that I am truly impacted by the responses. As people are sharing the article with friends on Facebook and social media sites, I'm hearing from lots of straight allies about their support as well. I am very proud of the years I spent playing football in high school and then in college. I'm even prouder of the relationships I made with those teams. The story here is entirely about my teammates and their open minds and willingness to re-examine some of their own beliefs. What I'm hoping others are getting from this story is the knowledge that those friends and supporters we have around us, really do look for opportunities to show their support. My teammates are incredible guys and they made sure that as a friend, I was alright. That's all any of us can ask from our friends, and to be given the opportunity to show that support doesn't happen enough. Giving your friends permission to be supportive can be an eye-opening and very reaffirming experience. It certainly was in my case. So...please keep sharing your stories with me and if it helps, continue to share my teammates' story with others! Brian Sims Thu, 30 Apr 2009 13:23:49 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc116 I am very proud of the time I spent playing football and I'm even prouder of the relationships I made on those teams. This story is entirely about my teammates. The guys I played football with, and the coaches I had, were willing to re-examine some of their beliefs and to take stock of what really mattered to them when it came to their friendships. As it turns out, there's a lot more people who want to show you support, than there are who want to take it from you. Please feel free to keep contacting me with your storied and please feel free to continue sharing my teammates' story with others! Brian Sims Thu, 30 Apr 2009 13:28:16 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc117 What a super story about a super, super guy! It is great to hear the stories of a successful 'outing', whether by accident or on purpose. If only more people had the confidence to be themselves to everyone maybe more people would understand that we are all just human beings that care for other human beings. Scott A. Drake Thu, 30 Apr 2009 14:32:11 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc118 Exactly! Most straight guys don't have a problem with fags as long as they act like real men. What freaks them out are the Barney Fwank types who make your skin crawl. I wish there were more normal gay men like him. I would tap that ass in a second. Daniel Thu, 30 Apr 2009 23:21:10 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc119 I think you missed the point. If you remember at the beginning of the article, the other gay football player Greg Congdon is mentioned. He came out the wrong way by trying to force his sexual preference on the team. Brian at least had the respect to keep it private until he was outed. Normal red-blooded straight boys have no problem respecting a queer guy as long as he isn't a flamer. The big mistake the gay community has always made is to make the drag queens and the flamboyent fruits so visible. Daniel Thu, 30 Apr 2009 23:25:23 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc120 [quote=Brian Sims]Giving your friends permission to be supportive can be an eye-opening and very reaffirming experience.[/quote] I wonder why players like Greg Congdon didn't have the courage to give their friends and teammates that permission to support them? Daniel Thu, 30 Apr 2009 23:29:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc121 Now this is the kind of sports story I live for....athletes that can be out help their teams win championships! t is inspiring to read about a football team that makes that happen! Helen carroll Thu, 30 Apr 2009 23:31:23 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc122 Brian, I just wanted to say hello! It is so good to hear you have done so well with your professional career. Go Huskies!!! Mary Gardner mary gardner Fri, 01 May 2009 14:52:15 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc123 Daniel, you have no idea what you're talking about Greg Congdon was outed by a nurse at his hospital, breaking the law and code of ethics to do it. Greg was totally innocent! Get your facts straight before posting such negative comments. Cyd Fri, 01 May 2009 23:01:55 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc124 Good Luck and old lawyers never lose their breifs either. Go for it; you'll do good! Brian Pierce Sat, 02 May 2009 04:52:04 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc126 Thanks for sharing this story. It was uplifting. As a nationally-ranked swimmer in Canada, I can honestly say that my experience wasnt so lucky. If you think the U.S. has its share of bigots who cant separate church and state you should get aload of Canada. They dont call Alberta bible-belt country for nothing. I wish I had never gone to school there. And, as for corporate Canada, it is one big sewer of homophobia. Particularly the Canadian banks. It truly is Canada's shame. Anyway, if it can be accepted so graciously and courageously in your state I dont see why it cant be done anywhere. Here's to praying it will happen eventually - even in redneck country. Dan Sat, 02 May 2009 15:57:33 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc127 Let's be frank here. The guy took a risk. A big one. Granted, Pennsylvania - however remote - is not Wyoming. But there are anti-gay lunatics everywhere and you never know when some of them are going to go rabid. In my case, my catholic father said I was going to hell, my mother tried to get me deprogrammed by calling every nutshrink possible, and my three brothers all had vastly different reactions. One said it was ok but was a supportive as a limp noodle, one said I would never see his wife and kids again and blackballed me from my parent's home at Christmas, and the other told me it was "just like infiniti - you dont fathom that and I just fathom being gay". So, yeah, this football player took a risk. Amazing that his team took it in stride and even defended him - good on them! And good on him for sticking to his priorities, being honest, and just getting on with his schooling and his football. Way to go! Andrew Sat, 02 May 2009 16:14:30 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc128 I really got a sense of pride myself from reading this story, I mean guys who are 20 something right now have no real idea of what people like Brian and others have had to live through to get to a place in our society where a story like this can really happen! Brian is a real inspiration but that doesn't mean that alls well now, it means we are finally seeing more and more stories with hapy endings rather than with someone hanging from the end of a rope! Lets hear more of these stories and not let people forget that to get to this place, many others had to live through some hell! bird Sat, 02 May 2009 20:35:32 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc129 I would really love to eat his ass Joe Sat, 02 May 2009 20:35:43 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc130 Sims is a true inspiration. Who knows how many countless athletes like himself never mustered the courage to be true to themselves and truthful to the general public. I agree with him that we are close to sexuality being an all together non-issue. I can't believe how much progress we've made since I was a scared closeted high school student in the late 80's. For sure we have much work left to do, but the substantial progress we have made should remind each and every one of us to be upfront and proud about who we are to everybody. If someone has a problem with it, it's THEIR problem, not ours. Shame has no place in our lives any longer. Shane Sat, 02 May 2009 22:36:41 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc131 It's encouraging to see an actual role model out there for gay men who are still of the mind that their sexuality does not, and should not, define them. Thank you, Brian. Chad Sun, 03 May 2009 01:00:14 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc132 It's funny how often gay people look down on Christians. They think that all Christians hate gay people, so they retaliate with hate towards Christians but at the same time preaching their own message of accepting eveyone. Seems a little familiar. What the general public doesn't understand is that, in truth, Christians are not supposed to "hate" gay/lesbian/etc people at all. The Bible teaches that Christains are to "love the sinner, hate the sin," and too often people (including some very "conservative" Christians) translate that into "hate the ones who sin." That is wrong. Yes, Christians do not and (by their belief) should not condone homosexuality or anything of the sort, but they are called and commanded to love everyone, including sinners, because the Bible teaches us that one sin is equal to the other. A lie is just as bad as murder. A straight person having sex outside of marriage is just as bad as homosexuality. So, even if you do not agree with Christianity, perhaps you should not make hasty generalizations about Christians because it is very hypocritical. After all, you get angry that some "Christians" do the same to homosexuals. What's the difference between you and them now? Justin Sun, 03 May 2009 01:54:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc133 This is an awesome story. I understand what could have been his pain but glad it was the opposite. Nice to have an uplifting story. Joe Sun, 03 May 2009 07:33:24 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc134 I read this with tears in my eyes, I would like one day here in Costa Rica thing like this happened… Costa Rican Sun, 03 May 2009 18:47:51 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc135 I read this with tears in my eyes, I would like one day here in Costa Rica thing like this happened… Costa Rican Sun, 03 May 2009 18:48:34 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc136 What a studd! :D Ow Ow! Good luck bro! :] Dkkk Mon, 04 May 2009 00:21:21 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc137 This guy is a former college football star, an attorney, an lgbt activist, a serious stud, AND he seems like an amazingly nice guy. This guy is my new spokesman! I want to see Brian's face and story everywhere! DerekR3045 Mon, 04 May 2009 10:43:45 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc138 I think this is an awesome story about a truly incredible gay guy. I played sports all through high school and I'm just getting out of college now and never had the guts to do something like this. Brian's a role model to every one of us who played sports, liked our teammates, and really enjoyed athletics. If his football team can come to grips with him, maybe my soccer team could have also. I'm sending this story to a bunch of my friends. Most of them know I'm gay and some of them just suspect I am. I hope this helps clear it up and gives them some perspective. It sure did for me. Way to go BRIAN! Dave Mon, 04 May 2009 11:08:30 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc139 Actually most Christians are fine with lesbian and gay people. If God gives you someone to love, who is Man to call it wrong? We don't know God's mind. Our understanding of Him is imperfect. One thing we do know for sure is that Jesus commanded us not to judge others. So we're better off doing what we were told to do, which is to take care of the needy, love our neighbors, not ask for more than we need, and otherwise pretty much keep quiet about it. Brian Mon, 04 May 2009 22:15:17 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc140 Just wondering why you had to state that at the start of your post? And,by the way, do you care if none of your friends are gay? Michael Ross Tue, 05 May 2009 09:58:13 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc141 If only the world could come to a point where stories like his were the norm, a lot of the now more feminine gay men [no offense guys, I'm one of u] would have the chance at being quite a bit more masculine. A lot of us gay folks actually have athleticism in our blood, but due to social stigma, we choose not only to hide our sexuality, but also to drop many scholastic sports altogether. This may be because, from a fairly young age we fear what may happen to us in the locker rooms if and when our not so accepting teammates, and the whole rest of the school for that matter, find out our "secret." If we knew that our sexuality would be no big deal, but rather would help people, we wouldn't worry so much about what would happen to us. Instead, we'd be more focused on bettering ourselves, both physically and academically, without the stress of all the social inadequacies that some of us already feel. Many of us who wish we were more masculine would have had the chance to interact with other males, or females in lesbians' cases, thus making us feel more at home with guy friends, and not having to resort to having mostly all female friends, which in turn feminizes us. Because we all know you are who you hang out with... Acceptance can make a world of difference, even just thinking you might not have it somewhere can ultimately turn you into an entirely different person. Joey Tue, 05 May 2009 10:46:18 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc142 If we knew that our sexuality would be no big deal, but rather would help people, we wouldn't worry so much about what would happen to us. Instead, we'd be more focused on bettering ourselves, both physically and academically, without the stress of all the social inadequacies that some of us already feel. Many of us who wish we were more masculine would have had the chance to interact with other males, or females in lesbians' cases, thus making us feel more at home with guy friends, and not having to resort to having mostly all female friends, which in turn feminizes us. Because we all know you are who you hang out with... Acceptance can make a world of difference, even just thinking you might not have it somewhere can ultimately turn you into an entirely different person. Joey Tue, 05 May 2009 10:50:00 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc144 I was an athlete in college, and captain of my team Senior year. This was 1982-1986--quite a different time--and my sport was/is Sailing, which is quite homophobic. Trained full-time for the '96 and '00 Olympics and was on the receiving end of a bunch of crap for being a fag: guys wouldn't train with me (much less hang out or have dinner after practices or events) for fear of being guilty by association, wouldn't room with me while training in Sydney (as a result had my own private room that I took full advantage of...wink), etc... The worst was finding out from a friend that, at a US Team-qualifying competition in which I was the top-ranked American, the official US Sailing coach got all the other top prospects together before the last day of racing and asked them "...do you want a FAG on the US Sailing Team...?" There were good moments too, like the last day of the '96 Olympic Trials, when a guy from Alabama came up to me and said "I never knew any gay people before you and it's been a big adjustment, but if other gay people are like you, I'm okay with it." You could have pushed me over with a feather...! These days I compete and coach two high school teams, having been completely out from day one. Things couldn't be more different: kids ask and tease me about dates, parents haven't said a WORD, and peers at my club actually sought me out for membership and are interested in my full life. It's a lovely change I am so grateful for. On this, the 40th anniversary of Stonewall, we all might think back on the myriad brave acts, large and small, of those who came before us. Their sacrifices make our lives as GLBT citizens not only easier, but possible. For those of you who wrote unfortunate comments about "limp wristed, cross-dressing" gays above, remember: it was the drag queens (not the "straight-acting" guys) who stood their ground that fateful night, changing our world forever. Let's accept and embrace our diversity instead of putting each other down! How can we anticipate acceptance from society at-large when we don't accept our own? Marc Jacobi Thu, 07 May 2009 12:46:45 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc145 There were good moments too, like the last day of the '96 Olympic Trials, when a guy from Alabama came up to me and said "I never knew any gay people before you and it's been a big adjustment, but if other gay people are like you, I'm okay with it." You could have pushed me over with a feather...! These days I compete and coach two high school teams, having been completely out from day one. Things couldn't be more different: kids ask and tease me about dates, parents haven't said a WORD, and peers at my club actually sought me out for membership and are interested in my full life. It's a lovely change I am so grateful for. On this, the 40th anniversary of Stonewall, we all might think back on the myriad brave acts, large and small, of those who came before us. Their sacrifices make our lives as GLBT citizens not only easier, but possible. For those of you who wrote unfortunate comments about "limp wristed, cross-dressing" gays above, remember: it was the drag queens (not the "straight-acting" guys) who stood their ground that fateful night, changing our world forever. Let's accept and embrace our diversity instead of putting each other down! How can we anticipate acceptance from society at-large when we don't accept our own? Marc Jacobi Thu, 07 May 2009 12:48:05 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc146 For those of you who wrote unfortunate comments about "limp wristed, cross-dressing" gays above, remember: it was the drag queens (not the "straight-acting" guys) who stood their ground that fateful night, changing our world forever. Let's accept and embrace our diversity instead of putting each other down! How can we anticipate acceptance from society at-large when we don't accept our own? Marc Jacobi Thu, 07 May 2009 12:48:51 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc147 just because you and other unsecured hetrosexual men have a problem with your MANHOOD doesnt mean its are problem and when a homosexual wants to keep his life a secret its because of idiots like yourself who wants to out everyone and cause a problem - whats wrong with your life lets start there before you start pointing your finger at everyone else and maybe we can start by making thing better for each and every one of US robbie Thu, 07 May 2009 14:26:47 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc148 thats not true - most of my friends are females and im male and gay which i dont act feminine nor does my partner but thats a choice that you have put on to yourself - you can still hangout with female and choice them to be your friends and act like a man i see it everyday in my community with all these gay men who hang out with other gay men that each time they open there mouth a purse falls out whats up that? then i see the gay men that act like men and they dont do manly man things to make them butchy its what they choice to be robbie Thu, 07 May 2009 14:52:52 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc149 Brian, Way to go. It is the same with gay rugby, and how it has evolved over the past decade. Dino Thu, 07 May 2009 15:21:12 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc150 I was a teamate of Brians and am not suprised to see that this story has come to light. Brian was an outstanding defensive lineman but more importantly a great guy. It was a good learning experience for alot of the guys on the team because many had never personally known a gay person in their lives and knew only negative stereotypes. I think the guys handled it well not because Brian was a great player, but because he was our brother and they got to know him as an individual first and a gay man second. Bloom won alot because of our togetherness as a team and the brotherhood that went along with it. I enjoyed playing with Brian and am glad to see he is doing well. Teamate Thu, 07 May 2009 16:08:12 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc151 Great story and another affirmation that being gay and masculine is the norm. We never hear about the high school guys that know they are gay, but easily mix with the rest of the high school population. I would say this is probably the most common experience for many. Nice to have a guy like this be one of us. Kudos! Assuming that "masculine gay men" are somehow superior and better to "limp wristed fags" is more of the ridiculous misogyny that pervades this society...THERE IS NOTHING INHERENTLY BETTER IN BEING MASCULINE VERSUS FEMININE...EVER...glad to see that this man's teammates accepted him...far more common is the situation where people are attacked, laughed at and verbally abused by other students. Until people get over this crap that masculine is somehow better than feminine, we will have this celebration of people who really are no tougher than those queens who 40 years ago made it possible for so many to come out...those are the REAL heros...always will be...it's the closet case so called "masculine guys" who stood aside and let Stonewall go down...so let's not go trying to assess who is better or worse by their degree of masculinity, shall we? Fri, 08 May 2009 04:49:48 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc153 I played football with Sims at Bloomsburg too and although I don't know who the other teammate of ours that posted above is, I agree with him completely. Sims was an incredibly unique guy to play football with and to have lead our team. He was such a part of the character and identity of that football team that it's hard to imagine those years without him. He was always looking out for his teammates and the younger players. Even though he was usually hanging out with the team, everyone knew he was very smart and got really good grades. Being a part of a team with a guy like Sims is something I'll remember forever. After kicking your ass all day at practice, this guy would show up at your house at midnight to help you finish a paper you had due the next day. It was strange, he was a hot shot in every way possible at Bloomsburg but you'd never have known it if you were around him. To this day I still have people from Bloomsburg who didn't play football ask me if I knew Brian Sims and ask me what he was like in person or outside of the classroom. I always respond that he was one of the greatest football players I ever got to play with. We had a lot of stars on that team but Sims was probably just as valuable as a leader than he was as a player. He was a truly incredible guy and when I see him now, it looks like he still is! BUballer79 Mon, 11 May 2009 10:32:26 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc154 To this day I still have people ask me if I knew Brian Sims and what he was like outside of the classroom. I always respond that he was one of the best football players I ever played with but without a doubt, was the best leader I ever played for. He was an incredible guy in college and when I see him now, he's still the same guy - fun, friendly, and smart. BUballer79 Mon, 11 May 2009 10:34:24 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc155 Right there with ya Joe. xy Mon, 11 May 2009 13:53:21 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc156 Dude, why can't you just live and let live? If that's what he was comfortable writing, that's what he's gonna write. There's really no need to bite his head off over it. James Mon, 11 May 2009 13:55:10 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc157 Thanks for this sharing this awesome story! I know a lot of young folks who need to hear this story. DJ Doug Madrid Thu, 14 May 2009 04:52:35 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc158 Brian is very lucky to have a friend like you Deborah and I am sure he appreciates it ! His story id very inspiring. It would be awesome to know him ! Keith warren Mon, 18 May 2009 15:13:19 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc159 [quote=Justin]It's funny how often gay people look down on Christians. They think that all Christians hate gay people, so they retaliate with hate towards Christians but at the same time preaching their own message of accepting eveyone. Seems a little familiar. What the general public doesn't understand is that, in truth, Christians are not supposed to "hate" gay/lesbian/etc people at all. The Bible teaches that Christains are to "love the sinner, hate the sin," and too often people (including some very "conservative" Christians) translate that into "hate the ones who sin." That is wrong. Yes, Christians do not and (by their belief) should not condone homosexuality or anything of the sort, but they are called and commanded to love everyone, including sinners, because the Bible teaches us that one sin is equal to the other. A lie is just as bad as murder. A straight person having sex outside of marriage is just as bad as homosexuality. So, even if you do not agree with Christianity, perhaps you should not make hasty generalizations about Christians because it is very hypocritical. After all, you get angry that some "Christians" do the same to homosexuals. What's the difference between you and them now?[/quote] "Hate the sin, not the sinner" is just another excuse not to like gay people and to take their basic equal rights away. Do not deny it. You know it's true. Tony Tue, 19 May 2009 01:27:55 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc160 Unfortunately, that's the only way you will get respect from the gay AND straight world. In general at least. [quote=Colin]Heh, I clicked this article because it looked interesting, and it was -- and I was surprised to find out it was right in Bloomsburg, only one or two exits away from me on the interstate! Bloom is one of the colleges at which a good percentage of my high school's graduates matriculate, including two of my first cousins, and I had never heard about this! Having grown up in the area, I can attest to its widespread homophobia, and it was nice to read that Brian had such a good experience -- even if it did take him being a 260-lb. football player to avoid being harassed. ;)[/quote] Tony Tue, 19 May 2009 01:38:27 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc164 Why is it necessary to state you or your friends are not gay? Does that somehow qualify you as superior or are you afraid that someone may say you are gay. I am so sick of these straight guys with their holier than thou attitude think they are somehow accepting. Hate to break the bad news to you, but many if not majority of gay men are probably more masculine than you and play football better than you. The judge of a man is not only his level of testosterone. rlk Fri, 22 May 2009 14:29:03 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc294 A Great uplifting story about a very accomplished and ambitious young man. The sad thing is that the article is correct in saying that this would have been a very different situation if the Brian had not been the outstanding player that he was. Acceptance of someone should NEVER be based on how successful they are in a certain field. The "scrub" on the bench may one day be more than any of us could ever hope to be, but because he wasn't a star player, his story could have and would have ended differently than Brian's. Good Luck to Brian in all of his future adventures in life. Jimbo Wed, 27 May 2009 14:07:45 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc353 A great story and proof that it doesn't matter what you do between the sheets or who you do it with, as long as you are a good person. dmcc Wed, 10 Jun 2009 03:23:05 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc380 First off, I would like to say that I believe this article is long overdue. Brian and I are great friends and have been for a long time. I could sit here and write pages upon pages of the great things Brian has done for me and many countless others or I could talk about his outstanding accomlishments and play as a football player. Instead, I would like to say that because of Brian and his convictions as a man and a friend I was forced to confront my own misconceptions and ignorance towards homosexuality. Being from central PA homophobia was prevelant and so was/is the ignorance that fuels that phobia. I first met Brian on a recruiting trip my senior year of high school and from there we became friends, teammates, roomates, and brothers. We sweat, bled, and fought side by side because we believed our team had something special and we did. We were from many different walks of life but we were a family. It was this belief and trust in each other that I believe allowed us to look past our differences whatever thay may have been. It was also this belief that forced me to re-evaluate my understanding and tolerance for something that was so very taboo in the community where I grew up. But how could I look down on a man who was ALWAYS willing to lend a hand to others in need? I could not! I mean even going into our senior year of football at BU Brian and two other of our teammates rescued a local teen from drowning after one of our double practice sessions. How can anyone say that just because we have differing opinions about our sexual orientation that a person is bad or immoral? I am a Christian but I believe that I do not have the right to judge others (eventhough I sometimes do). I believe that the church has the right to say who they will marry and not marry. HOWEVER, I BELIEVE IN THE EYES OF THE LAW EVERYONE DESERVES EQUALITY. There is supposed to be a seperation of church and state and therefore I feel it irrehensible when our government tells two people who are in love they are not allowed to have the same rights and privileges because some churches believe it is wrong, I mean what about the churches that do support gay marriage. I believe it is the good deeds and actions towards our fellow man that make us who we are and ultimately determines our fate. I mean after all nobody is perfect. It is this understanding that I came to because of my friendship with Brian. He never pushed his opinions on me or anyone else and he never appeared to be bothered when someone would make a derogatory or hateful comment towards the gay community. I'll admit there were things that I said out of ignorance that to this day I wish I could take back (but I learned from the experiences). Brian looked past those things and I think that was important for those of us who had much to learn about tolerance, understanding and respect yet in regards to homosexuality. Brian allowed everyone to come to their own understanding by just being himself. Not much changed after word got out. Yeah, there were still comments made by some but it got to the point where most everybody was comfortable talking about it and we were even able to joke around with Brian. The awkardness that some expected was not there. It was funny though to see how curious everybody was to learn about it. Like mentioned in the article lockeroom talk can be pretty brutal and Brian definitely had some questions that would make anyone blush, gay or straight. Sims you are a great friend...You know Leslie and I consider you like a brother. I am sure this story will touch many who out of fear hide their own story or out of ignorance harbor hate and misunderstanding. WE LOVE YOU MAN! HET!!! Henrie75 Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:59:45 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc436 Again, if he wasn't a football player you'd have the same misconceptions and prejudices against gay men. Tony Tue, 30 Jun 2009 14:57:01 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc444 Good luck in all you do Brian! Jim from Felton DE Jim Fri, 03 Jul 2009 09:23:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc448 Justin it's hard to know where to start with you. Saying something so poorly reasoned about gays and christains demands some response. What you've said is little different than "those Jews think all Nazis hate them so they "retaliate against them". Yes, when you pick yourself up of the sidewalk covered in blood as I have after being jumped by religious fanatics it's a bit tough feeling warm and fuzzy about "christians". If those people were not christians as you would define them, in the final analysis it matters not. Too many christian authorities have essentially given their followers a blank check. A Roman Catholic Cardinal went so far as to say that gays shouldn't be surprised by violent confrontations- i.e. gays are "asking for it". It would be nice if you would get some serious education and learn more about christianity and christian scripture. Your understanding seems very superficial. Please explain why in the new testament slavery is not only NOT prohibited, it is in effect endorsed. Could it be that our understanding of morality evolves? Is it possible for you to evolve?? In the time being, stop beating us up. You will find increasingly that we will fight back. DWINDC Sat, 04 Jul 2009 13:11:57 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc455 Brian, Really enjoyed reading your experience on coming out to your team. Thanks for sharing your courage when so many guys in sports today need a "hero." Your parents must have loved and encouraged you well while you were growing up. Your self-esteem is showing! Thanks for sharing, and I hope you are happy in life. Kentucky, USA Wed, 08 Jul 2009 01:17:46 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc518 What a stud! jim Wed, 22 Jul 2009 08:28:14 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc1024 :cheer: Awesome Brian! Good luck in everything you do. Tim Tim Mon, 24 Aug 2009 00:26:35 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc2019 thank you for an awesome story. Best of luck, lad! Daniel Sat, 31 Oct 2009 03:15:14 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc2260 Through the years I have repeatedly heard of stories like Brian's. Yes it took courage, and yes the team's response is encouraging. Unfortunately, this story is also as old as time. When someone who is different (gay, or crippled, or fat, or ugly, or is in any other way viewed negatively) but is exceptional enough in other ways society deems important(Brian's athletic prowess and obvious great masculine looks), humans tend to overlook the thing they otherwise would object to. To hold this example up as a beacon of impending gay tolerance is simply naive. History is full of such exceptions. (Dare I mention Obama) I only wish everyone who is viewed negatively for what ever reason could be exceptional enough in some way so they too could have the life Brian is having. Unfortunately, humanity has simply not progressed far enough yet for this. My above comments come from my own experience along with research into human behavior. I spent the first half of my life as a relatively unattractive effeminate guy. The result was hardship in everything I pursued. It did not have anything to do with my being gay, but rather with the perception in society that good looking people are smarter, better, more honest, etc etc. By some strange twist of fate soon after my 44th birthdate, my body started to change in a "good" way. The changes were subtle to me, but seemingly overnight I became much more masculine and handsome. I started to notice it at first because men and women were coming on to me for the first time in my life! At first I thought there must be some crazy thing in the air and ignored my new social status. But it kept happening, and more and more women and guys were coming on to me. Now that it has been a couple of years after nature's transformation of my looks, I have begun to settle into my new life of compliments, assumed high intelligence, business opportunities, and countless other benefits that have resulted from the change in my appearance. It still seems strange though, since I still remember all to well what it was like to be an outcast based on my looks. As an example, previously, I had employers tell me that they were "surprised" that I had graduated with highest honors when earning my BS and MBA degrees, but now everyone acts like .."of ocurse" .. I did. The bottom line is that much of what happens to GLBT people is not just anti-gay behavior from people, but rather a rejection of the GLBT person as a whole with the person's sexual orientation as simply another target for those whose intelligence is only moderate. Additionally, I applaud Brian's efforts regarding GLBT equal rights under the constitution, but always remember, you cannot legislate people's attitudes. The most we can hope for immediately is to make some people stop and think before they bash in the head of the effeminate gay teenager who is not a sports God or the epitome of a handsome masculine guy. John Sun, 08 Nov 2009 18:47:59 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc2271 :idea: Look at all the replies to this story. This is probably the most amazing and touching story I have ever read. Good on the straight guys for understanding what he was going through. You see people.....it aint that bad. Come out, come out, wherever you are. Dean Thomson Tue, 10 Nov 2009 12:29:44 +0100 http://www.outsports.com/os/index.php/component/content/228?task=view#josc2308 Great Story. I was captain of my high school football team. I played center.....so did the quarterback. :) Bub Wed, 18 Nov 2009 17:39:04 +0100