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2007 Outsports NFL All-Hot Team

Forget talent, this list is all about looks

By Jim Buzinski
Outsports.com

I watch a ton of NFL games during a season. With the “NFL Sunday Ticket” package I see all or parts of about a dozen games each week and then analyze the great plays, dumb coaching strategy and amazing endings.

Being a red-blooded American gay male sports fan, I also notice more than just the players’ performance. Hence, the 2007 Outsports NFL All-Hot Team.

The criteria? Hotness, by my definition. It doesn’t matter how a player did on the field, whether he started or how much he played. As long as he was on an NFL roster this season and looked good he was eligible.

These selections, unless otherwise noted, are all mine. For some positions, I deferred to friends or readers, who were adamant about their choices. There is a comments section at the end of this article, so fire away with your picks. Here are the starters, with my comments below:


Quinn

Bush

Peterson

Gonzalez

Owens

Thomas

Gross

Wiegmann

Steussie

Wade

Boss

Kearse

Denney

Strahan

Kampman

Fujita

Vrabel

Spikes

Piscitelli

Giordano

Bigby

Archuleta

Moorman

Vinatieri

Alstott

Quarterback

Starter: Brady Quinn (Cleveland). The hottest body ever for a quarterback and a terrific face make Quinn the hands-down winner here and overall MVP.

Backups: Alex Smith (San Francisco): I was smitten as soon as I saw him shirtless in an ice tub. He lost points by growing a hideous goatee early in the season, but regained them when he shaved.

Tony Romo (Dallas): This is for my friend JP, who jokingly (?) says he is going to stalk Romo.

Jim Sorgi (Indianapolis): 6-5 and 196 pounds of adorableness, with just the right amount of dorkiness.

Running back

Reggie Bush (New Orleans): A killer smile, and have you seen his eight-pack in the Subway commercial where he’s shirtless? This Saint has me thinking sinful thoughts.

Adrian Peterson (Minnesota): Handsome times 10, “All Day” could do it for me that long.

Fullback

Mike Alstott (Tampa Bay): Not exactly my cup of tea, but a longtime fave of Outsports readers. Over the years we have gotten numerous e-mails begging us for shirtless pictures of Alstott, as if we have a secret stash somewhere (alas, we sold it to Sen. Larry Craig two years ago).

Offensive line

Most lineman leave me cold, being a bit too bulky, so I will defer to longtime contributor Jim Allen, who watches the games with me and named these as his faves:

Jordan Gross (Carolina); Leroy Harris (Tennessee); Chris Massey (St. Louis); Jon Runyan (Philadelphia); Chris Snee (New York Giants); Todd Steussie (St. Louis); Joe Thomas (Cleveland); Todd Wade (Washington); and Casey Wiegmann (Kansas City), who Jim notes is “still listed as single in his late 30's. Hmmm."

Wide receiver

Terrell Owens (Dallas): What a smoking-hot body and he loves to show it off. But I could without the “Days of Our Lives” crying session after a playoff loss; methinks T.O. loves Romo as much as does Jessica.

Anthony Gonzalez (Indianapolis): I’m not wild about this rookie’s shaved head, but he’s got a terrific athletic body and he’s smart. In addition to the team’s playbook, his reading includes “The Brothers Karamazov.” Brainy jocks drive me wild.

Tight end

Kevin Boss (New York Giants): This is the choice of a reader, who says: “Could it be that Eli Manning has been playing inspired football lately because he has developed a special relationship with his tight end?” We'll see in the Super Bowl.

Defensive line

Jevon Kearse (Philadelphia): “The Freak” certainly has the body. As a Sporting News writer once breathlessly wrote: “It's tough not to stare at his chest, arms and shoulders because, damn, it's all muscle. And it's all good.” I’ll say.

Michael Strahan (New York Giants): It’s hard not to like his infectious gap-toothed grin and fun personality. Plus, he’s gay-friendly.

Aaron Kampman (Green Bay): Long and rangy for a lineman, he’s also sensible. While the other Giants and Packers linemen were stupidly trying to out-macho each other in the 4-below NFC Championship Game by wearing short sleeves, Kampman wore a thermal long-sleeve jersey.

Ryan Denney (Buffalo): 6-7, 264 pounds and great blue eyes.

Linebacker

Mike Vrabel (New England): Can you say superstud? This Patriot can rush the passer and catch touchdowns and looks terrific clean-shaven or with three days of stubble. A perennial fave of Outsports readers, Vrabel has crossover appeal for all types.

Takeo Spikes (Philadelphia): A smoldering intensity wants me to take on Takeo.

Scott Fujita (New Orleans): One look at those arms and that handsome face makes Fujita a perennial all-pro on this team.

Defensive back

Sabby Piscitelli (Tampa Bay): This rookie won me over with this shot from the Bucs’ training camp. A physical fitness freak, Piscitelli was hard to miss while at Oregon State. One person who was at OSU at the same time told me: “He walked around the weight room with no shirt on and looked at himself constantly in the mirrors. And he loved to wear skin tight Under Armour. He has massive biceps and shoulders.” (After posting this, I came across this shot of Sabby showing his abs. Yowza!)

Adam Archuleta (Chicago): Hotness personified with a killer body and he certainly has no problem scoring. His wife, “model Jennifer Walcott, was voted No. 15 in COED Magazine Online's list of Top 20 Sexiest Athlete Wives of 2007,” according to Wikipedia.

Matt Giordano (Indianapolis): A pity that he shaved his head, but this Colt safety is one of the best-looking guys in the league and maybe the fastest player on the team.

Atari Bigby (Green Bay): This hard-hitting Packer DB won me over when he hugged a very muscular fan in green face paint during the Pack’s playoff win against Seattle.

Punter

Brian Moorman (Buffalo): An awesome face and one of the best overall athletes in the league (Moorman was a college and high school track star).

Kicker

Adam Vinatieri (Indianapolis): He posed shirtless for a fitness mag a few years ago, dispelling the myth that kickers are the wimps of football.

Coaches

Nolan

McDaniels

I am not a fan of any particular coach, but many of our readers are (there is a Hot Coaches forum on our Discussion Board), so I will let them make the picks and comments.

Mike Nolan (San Francisco head coach): “The 49ers may not be the team they use to be, but Mike Nolan puts all coaches to shame.”

Jack Del Rio (Jacksonville head coach): “Jack looks REAL HOT in that leather Jags jacket he wore to the last two games!”

John Harbaugh (Philadelphia assistant, now Baltimore coach): “The new Baltimore Ravens coach is very sexy (and knows how to wear a suit).”

Josh McDaniels (New England assistant): “Pats QB coach Josh McDaniels could make me smile ... and play harder. Looking so sexy, even Tom Brady has to humbly hang his head. (Or is he peeking at Josh's crotch?)”