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Neil Everett is so straight he hates speedos

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ESPN SportsCenter hosts are so macho and cool. They're the most awesome, masculine dudes around, man. Just take Neil Everett and Robert Flores. They proved it last night when they showed a diver in a speedo plummeting a good 30 meters to the water below. Everett's comment on the dive:

You know what's not a top play? Wearing a teeny, tiny swimsuit.

Flores gave the obligated "Oooh" at the horror of a man wearing a speedo.

Wow, they are such masculine men. They don't like guys wearing speedos! I bet they dig a hot chick in a two-piece, too. They are so straight. I wonder how they could stand watching Michael Phelps win all those gold medals in Beijing. I mean, you could see a bulge in his swim pants! And sometimes he didn't wear a shirt! Yikes! Everett must have just listened to it on the radio.

I don't know how Deadspin could have possibly named Everett the second most likely ESPN sportscaster to be gay. He's so straight! They obviously didn't hear Everett diss speedos. If they had, they would have realized what a straight, macho guy he is. I just couldn't find any information on him being married to a woman. Ever. He's 48, so he must have been married to a woman at some point, right?