clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Rugby: The homosexual version of football

I wasn't sure what to make of this story over at Christwire, until I saw the quote they use to promote their Christwire book: "I am the anti-Christwire" - Howard Stern. The site is a lampoon of organizations that promote conservative Christian doctrine. Their latest piece puts the homosexual tendencies of rugby in its crosshairs:

Rugby literally means “From the rook fortress”, meaning essentially “a homosexual fortress”. Before the age of the internet and communication, this name was only known to the ‘in crowd’ of the gay community that they had a place to secretly practice their perversion. The gays in England had created themselves a safe haven under the code name “Rugby”.

Seasoned rugby players are confident and aggressive in expressing their homosexuality. In this image, a freshman rugby student is being stripped of pants and is going to be ‘scrummed’ from behind. If your son has moved to the Southern California area and has joined a rugby squad, quick, decisive action is needed as most rugby players are coerced into a gay act within one week of practice. The freshman in this image will never forget his first scrummed throbbing gristle.In its modern incarnation, a game of rugby is as raunchy as a group of desperate cat-nipped toking Vegas crack strippers jostling a drunken Hugh Hefner at 3am. Desperate hands clamor for a touch of flesh, hoping to get some sort of secret jollies while a crowd of somewhat intrigued yet disgusted passerbys look at the pathetic and obvious flesh fest.

The article demonstrates clearly that rugby can be linked to the spread of homosexual diseases like "syphillis, gay bowel disease and sore throats."

But the absolute best part of the piece are the comments, largely from straight diehard rugby fans who didn't see the Howard Stern quote at the top....

Hat tip to Jason Clodfelter.